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Not sure what to answer to my Daughter


Murari_Murari

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16 minutes ago, meri_zindagi said:

For example?

naku masth nidrostundi... cheppi cheppakunda... ni style lo archi teerchi champestunnav 😂

Paduko. Nothing will change tomorrow anyway. 

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please consider this as my opinion only , take it or leave it. I am not here to argue 


I have a 17 year old too , I asked her how are you dealing with all your or majority have boy friends and you don’t ... yes I discuss with my kids and pretty open . she told me that she does not care for boy friend or any sort of realtion ship as she has goals to achieve , she cannot have her mind on that . She did rejected few saying I have no time for this . Yes I trained her from child hood my perspective of good and bad . Of course my parents joined too..

same case with drinking and drugs... she understood impacts and explained me the calamities . She does understand better and how to deal with as o always said what your friends do may not be applicable for us .
 

my favourite quote if 100 people say some thing is right even though it’s wrong it won’t be right.

she is also training my younger .. I know they are not same generation as me .. so I requested her if you have to drink , let us do it as a family before you start with friends.. she said she knows impacts  and not interested at this age may be later 

said that I always explained about peer pressure ftom child hood. The reason to inform you all this , I always told we are always minority here so what your friends tella do is not same with several examples . Now I got questioned whats up with some other Indians .. then I have to explain her our own family back ground so on.

It’s not easy and not all kids are same . Every one has perception of what is right and wrong . For some BF is not a big deal for some drinking and drugs are not big deal . We all have our own justifications.

for me BF is not big deal as long as they understand consequences but drugs and drinking is big deal . Drinking after 21 I donot mind but Drugs is no.

i always explained consequences , please belive me when I say this , force is not going work long.

There is nothing bad about having a boyfriend or a girlfriend. There is also nothing bad about NOT  wanting a boyfriend or girlfriend.

It’s natural for you to want to to do some makeup, look good, feel good, so guys Notice you. Nothing wrong with it.

So look.

Forget what society is saying to you. You need to take stands , I have trained from young Gita and principles and Dharma. Not that she understood but an effort from my side .

If you want to look good, make up, get noticed by guys, go for it but just make sure you’re safe. If you don’t want to and just want to focus on studies and all that, and you got some passion about something to focus on, hey, cool, do that.

You can even do both if you like.

Don’t let anyone tell you you’re a bad girl, blah blah blah or stupid or etc

my training 

You’re going to hear and see a lot of this as you step into world a bit more. So just do what I did when I was 17 years old.

  1. I nodded whatever one said
  2. Walked away
  3. And didn’t give a thing and I still went and did my thing

So you go and dress up. You go and put makeup. You go and get guys noticed. You do so and don’t feel bad about it, guilty about it.

Nothing wrong with it and nothing whatsoever is wrong with you either.

So chin up, be proud of yourself.

by no means this is the answer this worked for me and I am not sure there is a correct answer.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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9 hours ago, JohnSnow said:

After 50 you dont even know how long you live?

Why do u think abt ur money then?

Just let ur daughter be happy uncle.

Your life is already succumbed to GC dream.

I am citizen

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On 8/20/2020 at 6:13 PM, Murari_Murari said:

Few days back she came home and cried, saying all her friends are having BF's( Mostly tellolu and few desis) 

They are making fun of her that she dont have a BF, as a parents how much we love she feels something is missing in life compared to their friends. 

she is asking dad am I allowed to  have BF, I said we can talk later, honest ga yem mataldalo telidu. what should I say to 17 years girl :( .

I know this day will come but hard to digest and hard to answer. 

Tsunami GIFs | Tenor

17 years papa vunna pedda munda vadivi neeke answer teliyanappudu... Pillakayalu anutunna db lo vallaki yela telustundi uncle :) 

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 8/22/2020 at 8:35 AM, Uday46 said:

please consider this as my opinion only , take it or leave it. I am not here to argue 


I have a 17 year old too , I asked her how are you dealing with all your or majority have boy friends and you don’t ... yes I discuss with my kids and pretty open . she told me that she does not care for boy friend or any sort of realtion ship as she has goals to achieve , she cannot have her mind on that . She did rejected few saying I have no time for this . Yes I trained her from child hood my perspective of good and bad . Of course my parents joined too..Awesome work you did 

same case with drinking and drugs... she understood impacts and explained me the calamities . She does understand better and how to deal with as o always said what your friends do may not be applicable for us .Cool
 

my favourite quote if 100 people say some thing is right even though it’s wrong it won’t be right. Easy to say hard to implement specially for teenagers.

she is also training my younger .. I know they are not same generation as me .. so I requested her if you have to drink , let us do it as a family before you start with friends.. she said she knows impacts  and not interested at this age may be later ...Wow awesome

said that I always explained about peer pressure ftom child hood. The reason to inform you all this , I always told we are always minority here so what your friends tella do is not same with several examples . Now I got questioned whats up with some other Indians .. then I have to explain her our own family back ground so on.

She has  a point though.

It’s not easy and not all kids are same . Every one has perception of what is right and wrong . For some BF is not a big deal for some drinking and drugs are not big deal . We all have our own justifications.

for me BF is not big deal as long as they understand consequences but drugs and drinking is big deal . Drinking after 21 I donot mind but Drugs is no.

i always explained consequences , please belive me when I say this , force is not going work long.

There is nothing bad about having a boyfriend or a girlfriend. There is also nothing bad about NOT  wanting a boyfriend or girlfriend.

It’s natural for you to want to to do some makeup, look good, feel good, so guys Notice you. Nothing wrong with it.

So look.

Forget what society is saying to you. You need to take stands , I have trained from young Gita and principles and Dharma. Not that she understood but an effort from my side . - I dont know them may be I start reading them,

If you want to look good, make up, get noticed by guys, go for it but just make sure you’re safe. If you don’t want to and just want to focus on studies and all that, and you got some passion about something to focus on, hey, cool, do that.

You can even do both if you like.

Don’t let anyone tell you you’re a bad girl, blah blah blah or stupid or etc

my training 

You’re going to hear and see a lot of this as you step into world a bit more. So just do what I did when I was 17 years old.

  1. I nodded whatever one said
  2. Walked away
  3. And didn’t give a thing and I still went and did my thing

So you go and dress up. You go and put makeup. You go and get guys noticed. You do so and don’t feel bad about it, guilty about it.

Nothing wrong with it and nothing whatsoever is wrong with you either.

So chin up, be proud of yourself.

by no means this is the answer this worked for me and I am not sure there is a correct answer.

 

I missed your reply sorry,  Thanks for detail message.

but she gets very influenced by friends easily + main problem starts with dressing koncham manaki ackward vallaki ademo pleasure hwo did you handle dressing part?

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On 8/22/2020 at 11:13 AM, Smile007 said:

17 years papa vunna pedda munda vadivi neeke answer teliyanappudu... Pillakayalu anutunna db lo vallaki yela telustundi uncle :) 

Ledu kid kontha mandi specially ladies age ki minchi alochinchochu or you can share how your cousins handled the similar situation like this.

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