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My wife and I had an agreement to help put each other through school. Now that she's through, she's filing for divorce (NM)


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Mirage

//Basically what the title says. My wife and I both wanted to pursue careers that require advanced degrees. We came up with a plan for each of us to work full time while putting the other through school. 

For the past five years I've worked to help put her through the last two years of her bachelor's degree and three years of law school. She's graduating in May. In this time, I've covered all of our expenses, rent, utilities, as well as payments to her loans. At the end of this semester there will be about $75k worth of loans that I am co-signed for. 

When I excitedly spoke of how much better things will be once she graduates, she was very non-committal and kept saying, "We'll see," when I talked about applying for my program. 

Two weeks ago, I was served with divorce papers. I was completely blindsided by this. When I asked her for an explanation, she simply replied that we'd been growing apart for a while and she needed to find her happiness. I found out this weekend that she met someone in school. He is the son of a named partner of a prominent law firm. 

She wants the student loan debt split 50/50 in the divorce. She is asking for no spousal support as she does not need it. When I responded that if she's going to be working as an attorney that I would be filing for spousal support, she called me a bunch of emasculating names and said, "It's over, okay? You need to let me go and be happy for me." 

I have barely eaten or slept since this happened. I have a consultation with a divorce attorney on Wednesday. I just feel hopeless. She hasn't worked in five years, is she free to just walk away and leave me with nothing? I know she has no income right now, but her earning will be significant in the future. Am I totally screwed?//

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Mistake of putting someone else’s goals ahead of one’s own

Diverting topic lo 

I think a fair compromise in this case would be for her to pay him back all that he paid for her education, at least in instalments. He should move on too since it's obviously not going to work anymor

EisMcSquare
9 minutes ago, Mirage said:

//Basically what the title says. My wife and I both wanted to pursue careers that require advanced degrees. We came up with a plan for each of us to work full time while putting the other through school. 

For the past five years I've worked to help put her through the last two years of her bachelor's degree and three years of law school. She's graduating in May. In this time, I've covered all of our expenses, rent, utilities, as well as payments to her loans. At the end of this semester there will be about $75k worth of loans that I am co-signed for. 

When I excitedly spoke of how much better things will be once she graduates, she was very non-committal and kept saying, "We'll see," when I talked about applying for my program. 

Two weeks ago, I was served with divorce papers. I was completely blindsided by this. When I asked her for an explanation, she simply replied that we'd been growing apart for a while and she needed to find her happiness. I found out this weekend that she met someone in school. He is the son of a named partner of a prominent law firm. 

She wants the student loan debt split 50/50 in the divorce. She is asking for no spousal support as she does not need it. When I responded that if she's going to be working as an attorney that I would be filing for spousal support, she called me a bunch of emasculating names and said, "It's over, okay? You need to let me go and be happy for me." 

I have barely eaten or slept since this happened. I have a consultation with a divorce attorney on Wednesday. I just feel hopeless. She hasn't worked in five years, is she free to just walk away and leave me with nothing? I know she has no income right now, but her earning will be significant in the future. Am I totally screwed?//

She is brutal minded...dhaarunam... , I dont know why  women this to very honest men.

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FLraja
1 minute ago, Mirage said:

Mistake of putting someone else’s goals ahead of one’s own

Evado okadu goal kottada leda 

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Sputnik
4 minutes ago, EisMcSquare said:

She is brutal minded...dhaarunam... , I dont know why  women this to very honest men.

edho quote undhi ga

by the time both honest man and woman meet, they're scared of each other ani.

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betapilli
11 minutes ago, Mirage said:

Mistake of putting someone else’s goals ahead of one’s own

That's what relationships are all about.

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Sputnik
2 minutes ago, betapilli said:

That's what relationships are all about.

goal reach ayyaka reach avvadaniki help chesina partner not good enough anipinchi vadilesthe what's the situation?

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betapilli
4 minutes ago, Sputnik said:

goal reach ayyaka reach avvadaniki help chesina partner not good enough anipinchi vadilesthe what's the situation?

It happens. Long distance lo unnappudu things are not the same as otherwise. 

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betapilli
2 minutes ago, ChinnaBhasha said:

men and women are not same.. equality doesn't work with them.

Equity is the word. 

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