Promises to Make

[praveen187]

Candidates are running from pillar to post to find new promises to make. Fat chance they have of finding any. Chandrababu Naidu has taken them all: free power, free rice, free money, free TV, free gas, you name it. What’s a candidate to do now? What can you offer to the voter when you go to him with your hands folded in a namaste and he has that expectant look on his face? What do you say to fill that awkward moment?

Some candidates are hiring consultants to find new promises for them to promise. It’s difficult. Your really have to look high and low to find a devastating pledge to make in this promise-rich election. After several consultations, Mohammed Saleem, the TDP’s Jubilee Hills candidate, came up with two new promises: he promises to pay the electricity and water bills of his constituents if he is elected.

To help candidates with no access to think tanks and consultants, votecong.com has decided to come up with new, unheard-of promises that are sure to swing the vote in their giver’s favour. Mind you, these are promises with real vote value. They address some really pressing needs felt by every voter. You make ’em, you win ’em. Here they are (to be delivered with a hand on the heart):

I promise

To conduct the marriage of your daughter.

To marry your daughter

To write your son’s Eamcet exam

To stand in the queue for you at the ration shop

To file your IT returns and deliver your refund at your doorstep.

To use my handkerchief to reserve a seat on the number 20 bus everyday. 

To geld your bulls

To carry a newspaper for your dog’s poop

To babysit your children when you go to a movie

To fetch cowdung for your gobas gas plant

To winnow the Rs 2 per kg rice provided by YS

To make vaastu corrections to the Indiramma houses

To wake up at 4 am to switch on your free pumpset

To fan your face during power cuts

To write your pension petitions to YS

[PUMPUHAR]

Ha Ha Ha...that was hilarious Dude!!! Way you go!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[twinkle star]

Good job....... *=: