k2s Posted August 20, 2012 Report Posted August 20, 2012 Hello, I am new to writing in this website but I have been reading it for last 1 year. I have a problem with having friends. Please bear with the long post. From childhood, I always liked to have a big batch of friends who would accept me as I am. Unfortunately, the reality is way different. I always had difficulty making friends mainly because I was very shy, reserved and sensitive (some people used to make fun of me, bully me and I instantly used to ignore them & their friends). In high school I met my best friend (X) and we soon became very good and then best friends. After high school, we were no more in the same city but we still had touch. Even if we didn't speak to each other for 2-3 months, it was okay because we had that strong connection. She was the only one I could confide into at any time & on anything. During college, I met a few more girls and we still be in touch though not frequently. After college, we got busy with careers & relationships and drifted apart. Now, of all these college friends, I have contact with just 2 of them. But, we say hi and ask about each other's lives in general. We don't discuss in detail. So, I find it extremely strange and difficult to have a heart-to-heart talk with them now. After college, I came abroad based on my job and continuing living here for last 5 years. As soon as I came here, I met a collegue (Z) who was friendly, nice and my first friend here. Soon, we got into a relationship but we were highly incompatible along with his verbal, physical abuse and domination over me. He suffocated me with his rules of not meeting new people, not talking with my other friends or collegues. After an awful verbal abuse session on me, I thought I was going insane and told everything to my best friend X. She also didn't know anything about my relationship with Z until then. She gave me lot of emotional support and helped me through the depression phase although she was continents away. During this stage, I also broke up with Z. After breaking up with Z, my world turned upside down because I had no other person to speak to here. I tried to make friends with a few people, but they snubbed me (I think the reason is that I never accepted their invitations during the phase of my relationship with Z). I felt bad, very inferior and like a loser. To avoid seeing my ex-bf at office, I took up a new job in another company. I am not sure why but I just couldn't make new friends with the colleagues in my office or anyone else. We greet a hi and that's it. During this time, my best friend X started ignoring me and eventually cut off the friendship with me. She never gave me a reason. I was so so so upset, I cannot say. She was the only friend I had. I tried to introspect many times and I often wondered if my emotional dependence on her due to the failed relationship with Z had anything to do with her friendship to break. I don't know. It has been 3 years. Then, 1.5 years ago I got married. My DH is very caring, loving and friendly. He became my good friend but I have not yet reached the comfort zone to discuss anything and everything with him. He made me meet his friends' and their spouses. I find myself most of the time tongue-tied. I don't know what to talk to them. Their discussions are very intelligent - sports, politics of various countries, stock market, entrepreneurship, etc. I sometimes feel lost in that crowd. I want to make new friends and have a good time. Everytime I see groups of friends at shopping malls, parks I feel sad. Please tell me how should I make new friends. I am also unable to forget my best friend X and her support during my very bad phase of life with Z. Please tell me how to get over the fact that she doesn't want to talk to me anymore. I don't know why I wrote such a long post about my life but please try to understand my situation and help me. thanku
Spartan Posted August 20, 2012 Report Posted August 20, 2012 Stop feeling insecure..and start mingling..or else..ur Dh will end up with someone else..... God Bless u talli..... chakkaga husband to kapuram chesko...
k2s Posted August 20, 2012 Author Report Posted August 20, 2012 [quote name='ChittiNaidu' timestamp='1345484000' post='1302342529'] Stop feeling insecure..and start mingling..or else..ur Dh will end up with someone else..... God Bless u talli..... chakkaga husband to kapuram chesko... [/quote]she's trying to be social yaa.........eey thappenti
Spartan Posted August 20, 2012 Report Posted August 20, 2012 [quote name='k2s' timestamp='1345484056' post='1302342535'] she's trying to be social yaa.........eey thappenti [/quote] socila ga undataniki try chestundi kaani...mingle avvalante bhyam estundi.. past lo edo tappu chesinattundi..or else bad experience...ayi untadi...public to ..
k2s Posted August 20, 2012 Author Report Posted August 20, 2012 [quote name='ChittiNaidu' timestamp='1345484107' post='1302342543'] socila ga undataniki try chestundi kaani...mingle avvalante bhyam estundi.. past lo edo tappu chesinattundi..or else bad experience...ayi untadi...public to .. [/quote]society lo ala free ga undali ......lekapothey bagodu
Spartan Posted August 20, 2012 Report Posted August 20, 2012 [quote name='k2s' timestamp='1345484160' post='1302342547'] society lo ala free ga undali ......lekapothey bagodu [/quote] nenu sepepdi ade..mingle avvu ani...
k2s Posted August 20, 2012 Author Report Posted August 20, 2012 [quote name='ChittiNaidu' timestamp='1345484199' post='1302342554'] nenu sepepdi ade..[size=5][color=#B22222]mingle [/color][/size]avvu ani... [/quote]mari adi chesthey........lokam aa fafa ni accept chesthunda......
Spartan Posted August 20, 2012 Report Posted August 20, 2012 [quote name='k2s' timestamp='1345484300' post='1302342569'] mari adi chesthey........lokam aa fafa ni accept chesthunda...... [/quote] [img]http://i39.tinypic.com/dztguw.gif[/img] single ga mingle kaadu..DH to kalisi mingle avamanna....
Anta Assamey Posted August 20, 2012 Report Posted August 20, 2012 [quote name='k2s' timestamp='1345484300' post='1302342569'] mari adi chesthey........lokam aa fafa ni accept chesthunda...... [/quote] Taney cheptundi kada.... Valla DH friends andaru koncham high talks vunnayi ani.... She should try to come up to it... If that the only the circle she has kada...
k2s Posted August 20, 2012 Author Report Posted August 20, 2012 [quote name='ChittiNaidu' timestamp='1345484338' post='1302342576'] [img]http://i39.tinypic.com/dztguw.gif[/img] single ga mingle kaadu..DH to kalisi mingle avamanna.... [/quote]she only understands mingle.....
tom brady Posted August 20, 2012 Report Posted August 20, 2012 confidence low lo undi faafa ki.....mandhu taaginchi vadalaali okaroju...lopala unna insecurity antha bayataki teesi set avvuddi appudu
Spartan Posted August 20, 2012 Report Posted August 20, 2012 [quote name='k2s' timestamp='1345484396' post='1302342585'] she only understands mingle..... [/quote] [img]http://i.imgur.com/tQkMo.gif[/img]
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