Nv Lol

[BMW]

Breakfast CAN B PAINFUL
when
Wife orders: Ramu, Sahab ke ANDE ubaal dena ..
Servant asks:
Memsaab,
Apka bhi doodh garam krun?
Abhi nhi Sahab ko jane Do phir.

[BMW]

Men will always be Men – Once a group of men decided to go for Tirth Yatra. Their guide explained them that they might see some ladies taking bath and they shd not get d istracted at all. When they see anything like that, they shd just say HARI OM and move on. Next day they started the yatra and one of the men in the group said HARI OM and rest of them said KIDHAR HAI, KIDHAR HAI!

[BMW]

Ek Bewda Daru shop ke malik ko
Raat ke
12 baje Phone Karke Puchhraha
tha.
..
Bewda =’Teri Dukaan kab
Khulegi?’
..
Dukaandaar = Subhah 9 baje.
..
Bewda =’Teri Dukaan kab
Khulegi?.
..
Dukaandaar = 9 baje.
..
Fir se phone karke Bewda
E bhai Teri Dukaan kab Khulegi.’
..
Dukaandaar = abe bewde Kitni
baar
Batau 9 baje khulegi,Subah 9 baje
Aana
Jaa ab Phone Mat Karna…
….
Bewda =’Are,Mein Dukaan Ke,
Andar Se hi Bol Raha Hu… [img]http://www.ulluji.com/ullu/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_razz.gif[/img] [img]http://www.ulluji.com/ullu/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_biggrin.gif[/img]

[BMW]

Aaj kal ke bachho ki haramipanti :
MADAM : shor mat karo nahi to khadda kar dungi..
Bachhe:
pehele mera..
pehele mera..
pehele mera..

[BMW]

Pota-
Dadaji Ye Condom Kya Hota Hai?
Dadaji-
Chal Bhag Mujhe Nahi Pata.
Pota-
Main Janta Tha, pagal Buddhe.?
Tujhe Pata Hota To Aaj property Ke 14 Tukde Na hote.

[BMW]

On wife’s b’day, man ordered a cake on phone.
Salesman: Wat msg to put on d cake?
Man: Write “Getting older but U R getting better.”
Salesman: How do u want me to put it?
Man: Well.. put “U R getting older” at the top and “but U R getting better” at d bottom.
When d cake was unveiled all guests were aghast at d msg.
It read: “You are getting older at the top, but you are getting better at the bottom!”
Moral:- Don’t order cakes over phone……

[cherlapalli_jailer]

[quote name='BMW' timestamp='1371131189' post='1303852731']
Men will always be Men – Once a group of men decided to go for Tirth Yatra. Their guide explained them that they might see some ladies taking bath and they shd not get d istracted at all. When they see anything like that, they shd just say HARI OM and move on. Next day they started the yatra and one of the men in the group said [b]HARI OM and rest of them said KIDHAR HAI, KIDHAR HAI![/b]
[/quote]

[BMW]

Girlfriend is like paanipuri always tasty,
“lover” is like pizza, hot n spicy,
“wife” is like dalchawal no other option but
good 4 health.

[BMW]

•Some. Great thoughts Failure is not when your girlfriend leaves you,it’s only when you leave her a virgin.
•Tension is when wife is pregnant! Terror is when girlfriend is pregnant! Horror is when both are pregnant! Tragedy is when you are not responsible for both!
•The Blue Whale ejaculates over 40 gallons of sperm when mating. Only 10% enters the female. And you always wondered why the sea tasted salty?
•Why is it that a girl looks down when you say I love you? To see if you really mean it!
•Why is sex similar to shaving? Well, because no matter how well you do it today, tomorrow you have to do it again.
•Wives are funny creatures. They don’t have sex with their husbands for weeks and then they want to kill the woman who does.
•Wife: My hubby & I have, what he calls-Olympic sex. Friend: Wow, must be a terrific sex life? Wife: Not really. It only happens once in 4 years.

[BMW]

A lady went to a doctor for help on her sex life..
Doctor: Give ur husband Viagra
Lady: I cant. He hates pills.
Doctor: Just put it in his coffee.
Next week, she came unhappy.
Doctor: Was it not good?
Lady: No, it was d best sex I’ve ever had. He had a few sips of coffee then pushed everything off d table & made love to me right there on the table.!
Doctor: Well, what’s wrong?
Lady: I’ll never be able to show my face in CAFE COFFEE DAY again..!!

[BMW]

In Ancient England,
People Could Not Have Sex Without King’s Permission.
To Have A Baby, They Were Supposed To Get King’s Consent.
They Were Then Given A Card To Hang On Their Door While Having Sex,
Which Read As:
“Fornication Under The Consent of King” (F.U.C.K.)
So The Word ‘F**k’ Came In to Existence..

[galigannarao]

rofl rofl rofl

[BMW]

Santa Singh the construction worker
On the 5th floor of a building needed a handsaw.
So he spots another worker Banta Singh on the ground floor and yells down to him, but Banta can’t hear him.
So Santa on the 5th floor tries sign language.
He points to his eye meaning “I”, points to his knee meaning “need”, then moves his hand back and forth in a handsaw motion.
Banta on the ground floor nods his head, pulls down his pants, whips out his dick and starts masturbating.
Santa on 5th floor gets so pissed off that he runs down to the ground floor and says, “What the is your problem??!! I said I needed a hand saw and u’re *** masturbating!?!”
Banta says “I knew that!! I was just trying to tell you that….
I’m cuming!!”

[BMW]

Wife computer par kaam karte hue apne pati se boli “Koi achha password batana….?”
Husband: “Lund”.
Wife has-has ke chair parse gir padi kyuki computer says “Aapka pasword Chhota Hai…”

[Sastrygaru]

neeyavva.. rofl rofl [img]http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-tNUt-7IvVq4/UYflB4TsRTI/AAAAAAAAEgs/PKqI36jIcIU/s1600/brahmilaughing.gif[/img]