Interesting Yet Disgusting

[quaysideGuy]

[center]I just happened to read this post on a blog. Manam maree antha darunam ga untama? Meeku evarikaina ilanti comments vinapaddaya? Naku first time ilantidi teliyadam.[/center]

[center]found it here[/center]
[center][url="http://ranjani-livelifekingsize.blogspot.ca/2011/04/normal-0-false-false-false-en-sg-x-none_23.html"]http://ranjani-livelifekingsize.blogspot.ca/2011/04/normal-0-false-false-false-en-sg-x-none_23.html[/url][/center]


[center][u]“ARE U GUILTY OF BEING A GULTI ?”[/u][/center]

Have you ever wondered, how are spy tortured when they are caught by the enemy country especially in places like North Korea or China. They follow the method of slow and sustained torture. They kill them inch by inch ,bit by bit and make sure that one doesn’t die and is very much alive to experience and feel the seething pain inflicted on them. So let me replicate the same torture ,same experience but with a tinge of sarcasm by taking you on a noxious, boisterous and high decibel land ----GULTI LAND. Gulti Land is the land inhabited by the weird Telegu people who are one of their kind, they breed like mosquitoes and are found in plenty, most importantly together.
[b][u]RULE NO 1: LITMUS TEST[/u][/b]
Now , just in case you want to try this litmus test and check if you have met the true Gulti take it up at your own risk. This Gulti Litmus Test is very different from the Litmus Test you perform in Chemistry Labs. In this test the tester’s colour will change. So if you do run into a Gulti check for the following: Your face would have changed from normal --- to pale---to dull----to sick depending on the amount of torture you would have borne. This is because even if you happen to talk to them for just five minutes all that you will hear is Andhra Pradesh mentioned minimum ten times. If you are little fortunate then probably about political rivalry happening there or about how much dowry they gave for their son’s or daughter’s marriage and the hottest topic of today would be heated discussion on success rate of Narayana /Ramaiya IIT coaching classes. One would wonder if the globe had just Andhra Pradesh on it and no other place. A person might be hopeless in current affairs but Gulti affairs would be on his finger tips. Chiranjeevi’s dog’s birthday would be of prime importance but if you happen to ask him this tough and nerve wrecking question of “Who is India’s current President?” you would put the Gulti into fix. He might guess after a lot of thinking, “ I think Chandra Babu Naidu” will be an obvious answer or “ Rajshekar Reddy”. But I can write on a stamp paper that Pratibha Patil would not even be in his options for consideration.”


[b][u]RULE NO 2: HIGH DECIBEL & LULU CODE[/u][/b]
If you spot a Gulti alone then a) he is not a Gulti even if he is , probably you met him in the loo because thats the only time they leave each other alone. Gulti people always come as a herd, now let me term them as a gang of Gulti. If you happen to hear a lot of weird sounds and noise as if people are fighting or a wild elephant is rummaging a utensil shop then do not be scared ,its just the harmless Gulti gang walking past. They follow the LULU code. Suffix every word with Lu . Yes, you got it right . “Lu” is the key.Neenu, Meeru, Repu...... and more of oooo—ooo—ooo. But the best part is that they can speak any language with Telegu. Englishlu, Hindilu and any other language(lu) talking they can do. They may hate each other ,curse one another but at the end of the day they walk together hand in hand. Speak only in Telegu come what may!! If you , by chance fall into that gang only 1 thing can happen YOU LEARNING TELEGU!! And not a 0.005% chance of they trying to converse in any other language you would probably know to make you feel better. They will give you a Gulti Look Do or Die . To put it in their words “Champestanu” (“I will kill you”) and unknowingly you would start speaking Telegu in just a weeks time and I bet you would be more fluent in it than your own mother tongue!!!.

[b][u]RULE NO 3: SPICY FOOD :[/u][/b]
Gulti needs are very less .So if you find a pyramid on a plate ,white in colour don’t think you are in Giza, probably or most likely you are sitting next to a Gulti Garu who would make a pyramid/mountain depending on whether he is planning on a light 3 course meal or a heavy 1kg power lunch. Then he would take his awful smelling “Geee”( please note not Ghee) ka Dhaba and do the waterfall step pouring of the Geee. Then comes the guest of honour for whom , I literally lay the red carpet. Its the red chilly pickle made from the hottest of red chillies ,dried in the Andhra sun, with masala brimming till the bottle’s neck and floating in oil(u). An average Gulti would take large servings of it as if taking some harmless curry and mix it with his pyramid(the rice heap). But for a normal person the very sight can activate his tear glands and make his nose run !! But our Gulti garu ‘s tongue would Ask for More....Spice is their life without chutneys ,chilly pickles and ghongura they are like fish out of water. So if you happen to be crying for no reason it means you have entered the Hell’s Kitchen.

[b][u]RULE NO 4: GREAT WALL OF CHINA[/u][/b]
Now this is a special rule but the most effective rule. If you have to find out a Gulti at once and if you are running short of time Great Wall ofChina Rule helps. Just casually ask him his name and if you get three answers for that one short question you have hit the “Gulti’s Eye”in normal parlance the Bull’s eye. Poodipeddi Venkata Raghava Surya Narayana or PKSVK Rao. Now don’t ask me to expand the initials... P stands for my town’s name, K for the city where I first wet my pants, S stands for my nanny’s name , V for my great grandma’s ex’s name and finally K stands for my name... J very short right!! J
Commonly found middle names Naga, Teja, Rama, Reddy..... Even if you have to call someone urgently it will take at least 15 seconds .Yarlagadda Venkata Samba Siva Rao. My god!! And if you try shortening even one of the coaches of that train long name they feel you are offending all those people who have contributed to the train of a name ,they have been endowed with through their ancestors.!!
[b][u]RULE NO 5: TOLLYWOOD[/u][/b]
The most common and widely known first love—Tollywood. If you are blindfolded and still you can feel the glare of fluorescent chest hugging T-shirt teamed with bright red pants then you are in for great trouble cause u have been brought to Gulti Concentration Camp aka Telegu theatre playing some hardcore romantic movie with no storyline whatsoever!!But our Gulti Clan loves them ,worships them .For them Cheeranjeevi’s family is much closer to them than their own family. The Telegu songs have even rap in Telegu so that they don’t offend Telegu sentiments. And if you happen to hear them speak for long all you would hear is “ RE” . “What Re , Why re... no re” and I could only think of Sting Ray!!!
But to wrap it up on a good note Telegu people are also one of those hardworking people who have a strong foothold in every profession.
You enter Apollo hospital and you would notice all the doctors’ sign boards by default end with Rao/Reddy. Then if you look at the Engineering domain it is even more flooded with Gultis. Narayana /Ramaiya classes produce battalion of IITians every year with such ease that you would wonder if IITs have some contract with AP government. And finally you would think if I go abroad may be I can evade the presence of a Gulti!! But Ahaan I am wrong again!! L
They have already invaded US and made it authentic Andhra and made such strong communities that I have heard that even Obama’s real name is Obama Reddy, residing in Whitelu Houselu.... . Also in the US theyhave their streets named after their streets back home and the same people live in US now. Now this is called unity. As far as their names areconcerned a normal name like Vijay or Asha would not make you feel happy when you spot it seven seas across. But a Suriya Kiran Gumma will make your heart leap with joy to have found a fellow Gulti on this alien land.
Now talking of their pickles its more like a ritual for them and a tradition to get together and make lip smacking pickles to stimulate one’s taste buds.
Finally no offence to all those Telegu people at whom I have made a dig its cause I have admired them and been with them for long that I take liberty to make fun of them... J So I dedicate this to all Ranga Rao s, Subba rao s and Reddy s without whom this place will be devoid of flavour(spicy), colour(garish) and not to forget ear drum wrecking high decibel(mellifluous voice)...
Cheers to Gultis!!!!!

Plss note gulti word is derived by non gultis by reversing the word Telegu
te-l-gu/gu-l-te.

[img]http://www.bewarsetalk.net/discus/movieanimated5/bemmi.hurted.gif[/img]

[k2s]

[img]http://us.cdn001.fansshare.com/photos/salmahayek/salma-hayek-609192718.jpg[/img]

[quaysideGuy]

[quote name='Scrooge' timestamp='1382133339' post='1304436421']

[/quote]
Topic enti.. ee bomma enti?[img]http://www.bewarsetalk.net/discus/movieanimated7/bemmi.etakaram.gif[/img]

[mukunda]

whole world antha america ni hate sestharu.....does it make america to give rats ass to others? never.
same thing with northies or gujjus or anyone...we dont need to give rats ass to them.

Infact northies or gujjus behave like sewage rats. this was confirmed by americans.

[img]http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-T94rOjs6Vug/UbRKEYtrL3I/AAAAAAAAHJQ/t5HgXhtQuGA/s1600/Bemmilaughingonphone.gif[/img]

[quaysideGuy]

[quote name='mukunda' timestamp='1382133501' post='1304436439']
whole world antha america ni hate sestharu.....does it make america to give rats ass to others? never.
same thing with northies or gujjus or anyone...we dont need to give rats ass to them.

Infact northies or gujjus behave like sewage rats. this was confirmed by americans.

[img]http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-T94rOjs6Vug/UbRKEYtrL3I/AAAAAAAAHJQ/t5HgXhtQuGA/s1600/Bemmilaughingonphone.gif[/img]
[/quote]
Adhe kadha. Akkadikedho veellantha royal families ainattu cuttinglu isthunnaru ga.[img]http://www.bewarsetalk.net/discus/movieanimated3/bemmi.lol1.gif[/img]

[salsa]

edcharu edavalu.... prathi okkadu professor ae pakkanavadini anataniki.... LU code ento kuda teliyani verri mohalu kuda telugu ni comment cheyadame... Telugu ni "Italian of the East" antaru... Ala enduku antaro vadiki teliyadu anukunta.. vedhava anlogies and verri chestalu.... RIP

[mukunda]

[quote name='Scrooge' timestamp='1382133339' post='1304436421']
[img]http://us.cdn001.fansshare.com/photos/salmahayek/salma-hayek-609192718.jpg[/img]
[/quote]

balls are so precious...

[size=4] [/size][size=4] [/size]

[TOM_BHAYYA]

Raasinodiki pani mxxa ledhanukunta.. Chadavaneeki naaku time ledu

[quaysideGuy]

[quote name='salsa' timestamp='1382133648' post='1304436453']
edcharu edavalu.... prathi okkadu professor ae pakkanavadini anataniki.... LU code ento kuda teliyani verri mohalu kuda telugu ni comment cheyadame... Telugu ni "Italian of the East" antaru... Ala enduku antaro vadiki teliyadu anukunta.. vedhava anlogies and verri chestalu.... RIP
[/quote]
raasindhi oka female anta.. frofile susanu

[k2s]

[quote name='TeluguPride' timestamp='1382133481' post='1304436435']
Topic enti.. ee bomma enti?[img]http://www.bewarsetalk.net/discus/movieanimated7/bemmi.etakaram.gif[/img]
[/quote]
[quote name='mukunda' timestamp='1382133664' post='1304436456']

balls are so precious...


[/quote]oka pic thoti...nee thadu ki entha mandi janalu came man....see

[quaysideGuy]

[quote name='Scrooge' timestamp='1382133993' post='1304436468']
oka pic thoti...nee thadu ki entha mandi janalu came man....see
[/quote]
[img]http://www.bewarsetalk.net/discus/movieanimated6/bemmi.prayer.gif[/img]

[mukunda]

[quote name='Scrooge' timestamp='1382133993' post='1304436468']
oka pic thoti...nee thadu ki entha mandi janalu came man....see
[/quote]

i want those balls man....ummkaay..

[size=4] [/size][size=4] [/size]

[quaysideGuy]

[quote name='mukunda' timestamp='1382134072' post='1304436471']

i want those balls man....ummkaay..

[size=4] [/size]
[/quote]
[img]http://www.bewarsetalk.net/discus/movieanimated4/bemmi.ayyo.gif[/img]

[Dhevudu]

wow..

[moviefan]

[quote name='mukunda' timestamp='1382133664' post='1304436456']

balls are so precious...

[size=4] [/size]
[/quote]


chala rojulu ayyindhi balls tho adaka !!