Stroke Of Genius

[ManOnFire]

 
On the drive over to his girlfriend's house, a guy listens to a call-in sex show on the radio. The host is explaining that masturbating before sex can help men last longer. The guy decides to give it a try.
 
He pulls his truck over on the side of the highway, gets out and crawls underneath. Satisfied with the privacy, he undoes his pants, closes his eyes and starts to masturbate.
 
Close to orgasm, he feels a tap on the bottom of his boot. Not wanting to lose his fantasy when he's so close, he squeezes his eyes shut tighter and stammers, "J-just checking the r-rear a-axle. Almost g-got it!"
 
"Well, you might as well check your brakes while you're down there because your truck rolled down the hill five minutes ago."
 
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[ManOnFire]

A Blonde and Her Thermos
________________________
 
At work, a blonde notices her that cubicle mate has a thermos.
 
She asks him what it's for, and he responds, "It keeps hot things hot, and cold things cold."
 
The blonde immediately buys one. The next day, she goes to work and proudly displays it.
 
Her cube mate asks, "What do you have in it?"
 
The blonde says, "Soup and ice cream."
 
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[ManOnFire]

Real Men
________
 
Three guys talk in a bar. Two discuss how they are king in their castles and how much their wives respect them. The third guy remains quiet.
 
Finally, one guy turns to the quiet guy and asks, "What about you? do you rule your roost?"
 
The quiet guy says, "Well, just the other night, my wife came to me on her hands and knees."
 
"What happened then?" they ask.
 
"She said, 'Get out from under the bed and fight like a man.'"
 

[crazyhorse]

Lol

[Yuvatha]

Lol

ok

[fake_Bezawada]

ok

rofl 

[Maximus]