Pellikani vallu idi tapaka chadavandi

[Heroin]

2 minutes ago, TampaChinnodu said:

If she is complaining he is not earning enough then she should probably go out and earn for herself. 

He has to tell that before marriage

[Desi_guy]

15 minutes ago, whatsapp said:

Examples of Red flags Read below story thoroughly :

I AM FALSELY ACCUSED OF DEMANDING A DOWRY OF Rs. 10 Lakhs.

CALL FOR HELP!

Disclaimer : I am not sure if I am the right fit to answer this question, as I almost got married. There were red flags and issues in our relationship which I ignored, but had to finally call it over 2 months before our marriage. We were yet to be engaged. 3 months later, a police case has been filed against my father, mother and me and I regret to the core why i even said YES to getting married.

I don’t really like ranting about my personal woes on Quora, but I am doing this anonymously today because I am scared and a bit scarred. I am scared for me and my family. I don’t know but i may also be seeking help from anyone who could come forward to help my cause.

TL; DR;

I am 31 years old Software Consultant, making a decent living from my job. I am one of the few many people whom the society terms as “well settled” , because I own a house and i did it 3 years back.

The entire episode of looking for a matrimonial prospect started couple of years back. A lot of parents speak to me, i spoke to a couple of ladies and but things did not fall in place. However, in the month of September of 2017, we received interest from a girl who as also an IT professional. I never asked for her salary, but i assume she made decent money because she owned a latest iPhone. After the parents spoke to each other, her number was shared with me.

We hit it off well after initial hiccups. My initial impressions were that she somehow did not seem to be interested, but caved in due to parental pressure. She told me that she wanted to continue with her job in the current location(which was different from mine) even after marriage, as she was up for a promotion. I appreciated the fact that she took her career seriously and agreed to it saying “we would figure it out later on”.

Her dad called me one fine day and asked me if I could travel to meet her. I told her the same and that was the day when i noticed the 1st red flag. She told me that it was unnecessary to meet now and we could probably meet together with families. I wanted to meet her in person alone, so that i could know her better. Her resistance made me wary, however she later agreed to meet me (when i think of it now, i realize it must be her parents who forced her to). I traveled all the way to her place and she took her own sweet time to come to the mall where we were supposed to meet. Apparently even her siblings decided to come along. She was late by more than 3 hours. That was the 2nd red flag when I think of it now. We met, had a formal talk , had a quick lunch and it followed with me hanging around a coffee shop for another half hour. She said she was sleepy and hardly spoke. Being a person who had invested his emotions to her for the past couple of months, i kept on talking. She called off for the day after another 30–45 mins.

Her parents called me a day later and said that even her daughter has given a go ahead. My parents traveled to her native period on 5th Nov(an important date) to see the girl and finalize the matrimony. Everything was finalized, dates were discussed. They offered me a car for which my father politely declined saying we have everything and all we want is a good daughter-in-law. They insisted us to bring the baraat to their native place and offered to pay for the railway expenses. My parents agreed to that.

In the coming months, our daily talks reduced to once a week and sometimes even lesser. All this because she used to be either busy having her chai or seeing BiggBoss on TV. When i asked where she wanted to go for honeymoon, she asked me to look into it and make the bookings. I should have sensed a rat here, but like a emotional fool i ignored it. Her level of interests continued dipping.

My extended family was excited and going bonkers as it was supposed to be a marriage after a long time. I am very close to my cousins and this is when the story takes a serious turn. We were in the final leg of preparation and even the marriage invitation cards were printed. Less than 2 months before marriage, one fine evening, she called me and demanded “What is the intention of that video”. To give a context, by elder sister had asked her for a photo which she wanted to use for digital invite. My sister got the photo for this female conveying the same. However, now she feigned innocence and created a big ruckus on phone. I kept cool for sometime, but told her that I was completely unawares. If the photo was an issue, I would ask my sister to delete the photo and the video altogether. She got pissed to another level and told me that “I would send you to jail if this photo spread any further”. I was shocked and took a minute to grasp what just happened. I called my sister and informed her what just had happened. My sister thought she was responsible for this chaos and started crying. It was probably for the 1st time in my life, i made my sister cry because of a girl i barely knew. I was guilt ridden and was in huge dilemma. Though i understood that canceling the marriage 2 months before would have huge repercussions both financially and personally, i did not know how to take it up in front of my parents.

I decided to be honest to my parents and narrated the entire episode. They were aghast on hearing the “send to jail” part. I would always owe to my parents that they supported me completely and asked me to just try reconciling once before making it officially. I sent her a text saying that “Lets meet at your location and talk it out”. She bluntly replied to it saying “Leave me alone for few days”.

I waited her to call back for the next 5 days and finally sent her a text asking if she was apologetic about the incident. She said she did not want to talk about it and there was nothing to sort. I was again shocked how she took this very lightly. I decided to install a recorder on my phone to record the call in case things go south. Now When I think about it, its the best decision i took.

She called me couple of days later asking what the matter was. I straight away came to the point and asked her to apologize me. She said she was not apologetic and would not apologize. Instead she blamed me for being sarcastic the last time. I said i come from a decent family and am a lay abiding citizen and asked her what she meant me by sending to jail. She said she blurted out in anger but is not about it. I told her how disrespecting that was and how i have already told my parents about it. She lost it as soon she heard it and called me a low mentality guy with no sense at all. In the 1 hour recorded call she told 3 times that the marriage is over from her end and she cannot marry to someone who is of such a low class.

I thought it was over and went out of station just because I want to get away for a sever depression. My father officially called them and told everything. Things went south from there. The girl in question kept calling me on whatsapp/phone, sent text messages/emails saying she was apologetic for her behavior. I did not respond because I knew if i changed my mind now, it would happen again after marriage and I would be totally screwed.

We informed them about the decision on call and also through relatives. Still they kept pestering, so my father decided to block their number. 1 month later, the girl’s father with 5 other people came over to my place(where my dad lived), when he was in office. My mom was alone at home. They called me dad and he got scared for my mom. He called the local police and asked for security. The local police was quick enough to come to my home before they could have some and ensured my parents safety. Finally they called my dad saying they would see us in court now.

1 month later, i got a call from police. Truecaller told me it was a call from police(from a personal mobile). I knew what had happened. I did not take the call. He kept calling. Finally my dad spoke to him and he said that we have appear in their area’s local police station as there was a written complaint against. We immediately met my native place’s police where we had complained earlier when they had come to intimidate my parents. We recorded a station diary for that.

A month later on 10th May, my father received a police notice to appear before the girl’s native police as there was FIR lodged against my mom, father and me under section 405/420.

They have accused the following:

They had given cash of Rs 50000/- when they had come to meet me. They gave another Rs 5 lakhs when my parents went to meet their parents. And they had called off the marriage as i demanded another Rs 10 lakhs from girl.

An advocate of women right which I have always been vocally, I was shocked, angered and broke down. I have no idea what to do. We have arranged a lawyer to take care of the proceedings.

The only thing I have learnt is that the next time when a woman cries fowl against a guy, I would never trust the female.

Thanks!

[boeing747]

Maha murthy unkle shud have a debate on this with likesbof srireddy, kathi et al

[Demigod]

1 minute ago, boeing747 said:

Maha murthy unkle shud have a debate on this with likesbof srireddy, kathi et al

long weekend korikalu bane unnai neeku...

[boeing747]

3 minutes ago, Demigod said:

long weekend korikalu bane unnai neeku...

Full time pass avuddi baa

[Demigod]

2 minutes ago, boeing747 said:

Full time pass avuddi baa

ade bro ardam ayyindi...time pass ki watch sree reddy discussions again no..

[Myth1]

Lol   

[Hydrockers]

1 hour ago, Heroin said:

Inka enta sepu wife spend chestundi ani crying.em wife happiness ne happiness avvada? Neku problems vaste wife unconditionally help cheyali affectionate ga undali.wife emana barinchaleru

software engg wife CEO wife laga feel ayyipoyi karchu petteste ela akkai

[TampaChinnodu]

1 hour ago, Heroin said:

He has to tell that before marriage

pelli ki mundu teliyada enti salary ?

he can complain same too. That she is not doing house work as others , Or she is not beautiful as others. 

[Ara_Tenkai]

1 hour ago, Heroin said:

Inka enta sepu wife spend chestundi ani crying.em wife happiness ne happiness avvada? Neku problems vaste wife unconditionally help cheyali affectionate ga undali.wife emana barinchaleru

hahaha...

[whatsapp]

28 minutes ago, TampaChinnodu said:

pelli ki mundu teliyada enti salary ?

he can complain same too. That she is not doing house work as others , Or she is not beautiful as others. 

She is not beautifil ante Vammo 3rd world war radu !! Nuvu andagana vunava ne akka vunda ne amma vunda ani questions vasthayi.

[Spartan]

Anonymous
Answered May 13
Story of my life !
I am Software engr working in a Mumbai based MNC.Married a girl of my caste in Hyd (also a software engineer) 2.5 yrs back.
6 months after marriage,may she doesn't like me or what,files the dreaded false Dowry -498A case(mind you Dowry need not be taken for a Dowry case to be filed,for the records we had taken anything from her) against me and my family.
Then follows up with a false Domestic Violence case for 38 Lakhs
Then she files a civil case demanding 50 Lakhs.
If this wasn't enough she files Mtc case demanding 30k monthly.
And the cases run in Hyderabad, so have to travel around 2–3 times per month to Hyderabad from Mumbai.
This has been going on for close to 2.5 yrs now.
The point I want to make here is inspite of she having no proofs,no wrongdoings from our end, it is so easy for a women to file close to 4 cases (1 of them being a criminal case) and run them for close to 2.5 yrs(God only knows how many years more).
See the double standards,she has put Dowry case on me and my family and openly asks 30 Lakhs as settlement Alimony.
Hypocrisy at its best !

[Anta Assamey]

[psycopk]

4 minutes ago, Spartan said:

Anonymous
Answered May 13
Story of my life !
I am Software engr working in a Mumbai based MNC.Married a girl of my caste in Hyd (also a software engineer) 2.5 yrs back.
6 months after marriage,may she doesn't like me or what,files the dreaded false Dowry -498A case(mind you Dowry need not be taken for a Dowry case to be filed,for the records we had taken anything from her) against me and my family.
Then follows up with a false Domestic Violence case for 38 Lakhs
Then she files a civil case demanding 50 Lakhs.
If this wasn't enough she files Mtc case demanding 30k monthly.
And the cases run in Hyderabad, so have to travel around 2–3 times per month to Hyderabad from Mumbai.
This has been going on for close to 2.5 yrs now.
The point I want to make here is inspite of she having no proofs,no wrongdoings from our end, it is so easy for a women to file close to 4 cases (1 of them being a criminal case) and run them for close to 2.5 yrs(God only knows how many years more).
See the double standards,she has put Dowry case on me and my family and openly asks 30 Lakhs as settlement Alimony.
Hypocrisy at its best !

ee post chuste inko 4 caselu petudi... 

[Spartan]

Just now, psycopk said:

ee post chuste inko 4 caselu petudi...