13 Secrets You Should Always Keep From Your Partner If You Want Your Relationship To Last

[afacc123]

 

Conventional wisdom dictates that lying is bad, lying to a friend is worse, and lying to a lover is verboten. The building blocks of a healthy relationship are integrity, comity, and, above all, honesty. Break any part of that base and the whole shebang comes crashing down.

---

READ ALSO: 12 Negative Habits That Destroys Relationships That You Should Avoid

---

 

But let’s face it: life isn’t always so simple, and we’re not all Boy Scouts. In fact, I’d be willing to put forth that lying can actually be not only smart but also very healthy for a relationship. Does she really need to know that you loathe her friends? Would it really help things if he learned your feelings about his eating habits? On both counts, the answer is no—and that’s just us being honest.

Read on to learn the instances where you should hold your tongue.

 

1. Your Sexual History

 

While it might sometimes come up in conversation, relationship experts say that apart from any medical concerns you might have (like whether you’re both up-to-date on STD testing, for example), discussing your sexual history with your current boo has pretty much zero benefits. Don’t ask and don’t tell on this one. Some people love the juvenile idea of a virgin bride or groom, some really want a seasoned partner, and most land somewhere in between. But more often than not, this is a topic that should stay off-limits even if you think you can predict the results.

2. Your Secret Single Behaviors

Look: everyone does strange things when they’re alone; it’s totally normal. “If you indulged in some weird behavior while you were alone, such as eating an entire cake while binge-watching bad TV in your underwear, keep that to yourself. This information won’t be helpful to your partner in any way, so they don’t need to know about it.

3. Your Minor Relationship Doubts

There are times in both new and long-standing relationships when you may find yourself questioning whether you want the relationship to continue. If it’s the first time you’re having these feelings, don’t feel like you have to share them with your partner. These initial thoughts are not helpful to share because they will create insecurity and hurt feelings. And very often, they’ll resolve on their own. Sit with your feelings and process them on your own. Only if the feelings persist and become stronger over time should you share them with your partner.

4. That You Wish They Were More Successful

Let’s say your partner has a job that they’re passionate about, but it doesn’t necessarily leave them rolling in dough. Or maybe you can’t figure out why they don’t just try just a little harder to move up the ranks at their current gig. If you share this frustration, your comments will be experienced as unsupportive and hurtful to your partner. In the end, it’s probably better to keep these thoughts to yourself. This is especially true if your partner has ever struggled with self-confidence issues in the past.

5. You Dislike One of Their Family Members

This is one of the hardest secrets to keep, but one of the most important. You certainly don’t have to say you love them, but spewing any hate will only backfire. And if their mother, sister, brother, uncle, or whoever truly is terrible, eventually this issue will come to light and you play a supportive role.

---

READ ALSO: 8 Types Of Women You Should Never Consider For Marriage As Christian

---

 

6. That You Don’t Like Something They Can’t Change

Another time you don’t have to be brutally honest? When your partner can’t do anything about your complaint. It’s much kinder to harbor little white lies having to do with your partner’s haircut, hair color, meatloaf recipe, and dance moves. If you love someone, sacrifice the truth in these situations. Tell them you want seconds on the meatloaf, ask them to dance, and compliment their haircut. Their smile in return will let you know you did the right thing.

 

7. You Think One Of Their Friends Is Hot

 

If you’re attracted to one of their close friends, it’s okay to keep that a secret. Of course, this is only true if you never plan to act on your attraction. If you do, that’s a totally different situation and a conversation should be had about it. But if it’s just simply that you’re a little bit attracted to one of their friends, it’s no big deal. Plus, you’d make everything immediately awkward if you told your partner that you think their friend is hot. On the other hand, it’s fun to be attracted to.

8. What You Spend Your Own Personal Money On

You’ve probably heard the advice before that even if you have joint finances as a couple, each of you should have your own personal bank account, as well. There are several reasons for this, but one of them is that it’s really okay to spend money on little things that your partner doesn’t know about. There are times when you spend money just for you. Obsessed with an expensive pair of sneakers that you know your partner would not approve of spending 300 dollars on? No big deal. If those expenses start to impact your joint finances, you will have to talk about it.

9. Anything Negative Your Friends or Family Say About Them

It is best if you don’t share the initial negative reactions that your loved ones had about your partner. These comments can be very hurtful and hard to recover from. If you reveal them, your partner will always remember what was said and later on may use it as evidence that your family or friend never liked them from the start. Plus, what do they gain from knowing? That’s right—nothing.

---

READ ALSO: 10 qualities of a good woman that you should consider before marriage

---

 

10. You’ve Had Better Sex

So maybe you’ve had a better time between the sheets with one of your past love interests. This isn’t something you should share with your current lover. Your partner wants to know that they are the best lover ever. They want you to forget all others before them, so let them think you have. There is no good that can come from letting your partner know how great the sex was with someone else from your past. In fact, it opens up a Pandora’s Box, so keep that closed. Tell them they’re the best you’ve ever had, and watch their self esteem (an unexpected aphrodisiac) blossom. Plus, the good news is we know just how to transform your partner into a sex goddess.

11. That You Weren’t Initially Attracted to Them

Attraction often grows after getting to know someone. Offhandedly mentioning that it took some time for you to become attracted to your current partner is not amusing or helpful to them. This information is hurtful and now irrelevant. You are with them now for a reason, so you do not need to share that the attraction eventually grew.

12. You Like “X” Better About Your Ex

There is no point of reminiscing with your partner about what you miss from your ex or what was better in that relationship. After all, what will that accomplish? Maybe your ex was a better cook, planned better dates, or shared your interest in a certain hobby, but your past relationship ended for a reason, so let it go. Time is better spent taking what you have learned and enjoyed and building on it where you can in this relationship.

13. That You Think They Should Lose Weight

But you knew that already, don’t think I need to tell you that.

[Heroin]

Àbsolutly

[Odale]

Lunchtime evaritho....secret

[cosmopolitan]

+1.... Anything Negative Your Friends or Family Say About Them

[afacc123]

30 minutes ago, cosmopolitan said:

+1.... Anything Negative Your Friends or Family Say About Them

It is best if you don’t share the initial negative reactions that your loved ones had about your partner. These comments can be very hurtful and hard to recover from. If you reveal them, your partner will always remember what was said and later on may use it as evidence that your family or friend never liked them from the start. Plus, what do they gain from knowing? That’s right—nothing.

[Scada]

🤭..most of the points not applicable to desi pillakais