Best friends changed

[pavanjagan]

I have a group of engineering friends who were very very close to me to an extent their families

visit us on many occasions more than our relatives. Sleep overs, dining was a common thing. But

my last visit to India gave me different experience. My friends are not discussing any fun stuff or

having relaxing chat most of the time I was with them they were trying boast about their achievements

and declare their properties. In a subtle way everyone was trying to show their superiority on others.

They no more have that innocent smile, big laugh for silly jokes, caring. In college days they would go to 

any extent to help each other but now they are trying avoid each other as much as possible. After our get together I came to know that they are not even meeting each other. We may be busy with our life but that 

doesn't we ignore friends and go in a rat race.

[Saloly]

🥲

[sarfaroshi]

17 minutes ago, pavanjagan said:

I have a group of engineering friends who were very very close to me to an extent their families

visit us on many occasions more than our relatives. Sleep overs, dining was a common thing. But

my last visit to India gave me different experience. My friends are not discussing any fun stuff or

having relaxing chat most of the time I was with them they were trying boast about their achievements

and declare their properties. In a subtle way everyone was trying to show their superiority on others.

They no more have that innocent smile, big laugh for silly jokes, caring. In college days they would go to 

any extent to help each other but now they are trying avoid each other as much as possible. After our get together I came to know that they are not even meeting each other. We may be busy with our life but that 

doesn't we ignore friends and go in a rat race.

Welcome to reality 

[halwa_fan]

this is the reality, intha time pattinda to know this.. hardly 3-4 years lo telsipoddi  

[ranku_mogudu]

20 minutes ago, pavanjagan said:

I have a group of engineering friends who were very very close to me to an extent their families

visit us on many occasions more than our relatives. Sleep overs, dining was a common thing. But

my last visit to India gave me different experience. My friends are not discussing any fun stuff or

having relaxing chat most of the time I was with them they were trying boast about their achievements

and declare their properties. In a subtle way everyone was trying to show their superiority on others.

They no more have that innocent smile, big laugh for silly jokes, caring. In college days they would go to 

any extent to help each other but now they are trying avoid each other as much as possible. After our get together I came to know that they are not even meeting each other. We may be busy with our life but that 

doesn't we ignore friends and go in a rat race.

You forgot to grow up with time in mentality? Or your expectations are still childish?

 

reality lo vallu brathukuntey! Nuvvu insecurity tho past lo kurchunnava? Just asking anthey bro! No offense meant.

 

its just that perception of yours since you are meeting them after a long time ! But since they meet more often they are in a race to build up assets! Offcourse US lo nee other group of friends kooda million dollar homes! Rich area! Best school for kids aney discuss chesukuntaru kadha

[Thokkalee]

24 minutes ago, pavanjagan said:

I have a group of engineering friends who were very very close to me to an extent their families

visit us on many occasions more than our relatives. Sleep overs, dining was a common thing. But

my last visit to India gave me different experience. My friends are not discussing any fun stuff or

having relaxing chat most of the time I was with them they were trying boast about their achievements

and declare their properties. In a subtle way everyone was trying to show their superiority on others.

They no more have that innocent smile, big laugh for silly jokes, caring. In college days they would go to 

any extent to help each other but now they are trying avoid each other as much as possible. After our get together I came to know that they are not even meeting each other. We may be busy with our life but that 

doesn't we ignore friends and go in a rat race.

Did you stay in touch with them all this time? Or you just tried to meet them bcoz you went to India? 
people move on and change very fast.. 

[Tryad]

the normal reaction to something like this is to make slight changes to yourself to reflect the attitudes of the people you want to keep up with. Doing that is pathetic. There's nothing nice gloating about the properties you bought or your instincts for nice investments. Its no way to live.

find better friends who you can do something with, not just sit around and joke about girls or whatever (time for that has passed). Not astroturfed stuff, but simple things like cooking, painting, biking, hacking or stuff you are passionate about. Keep your friends diverse. both rich and poor, both academic and corporate, both from govt and activist, both from economics and investment managers etc. and don't make the mistake of investing in any relationship to the extent that you start expecting something that is beyond their capacity.

don't just move around boring IT people, who don't even talk coding. some friends there will help too. Just be choosy. There's no rat race, if you don't want to race. And its perfectly possible to live a nice life without participating in any race, or justifying people who enthusiastically participate in it.

keep away from people who love Elon Musk. Its a huge red flag. these people are downright disgusting.

[Tryad]

explore life dude. People are your window to a new experience. Don't feel for the lost relationships, there's always one around the corner if you cared to look.

Pretty sure you were crap during your youth. I know I was. I can't remember any guy who was actually a nice guy during my youth. but I regularly see people fondly remembering their youth, never remembering the people they hurt during their youth. My memories of my youth are full of people I hurt, sometimes unintentionally, sometimes intentionally.

identify your inner asshole, and get him out. and leave this db. find better things to do.

[Tryad]

my best friends never changed. So I guess I was lucky in that way.

but we never talked about girls. coz we fcuked each other 😊

I miss them. I know they will still stay the same when we meet next time.

[Joker_007]

52 minutes ago, ranku_mogudu said:

You forgot to grow up with time in mentality? Or your expectations are still childish?

 

reality lo vallu brathukuntey! Nuvvu insecurity tho past lo kurchunnava? Just asking anthey bro! No offense meant.

 

its just that perception of yours since you are meeting them after a long time ! But since they meet more often they are in a race to build up assets! Offcourse US lo nee other group of friends kooda million dollar homes! Rich area! Best school for kids aney discuss chesukuntaru kadha

Nope! not in my circle .. we never cared about this. 

In India it became like Race to become rich.. I asked most of Indian friends ..what makes them to think they won this Race or at what point they are going to end this , most of them do not have answer to this. there is no end to this until you develop positive side of thinking and stop lowering your self esteem. 

[praying]

10 minutes ago, Tryad said:

my best friends never changed. So I guess I was lucky in that way.

but we never talked about girls. coz we fcuked each other 😊

I miss them. I know they will still stay the same when we meet next time.

You guys ** each other aa? Idedo chala tedagq undi uncle 

[ranku_mogudu]

7 minutes ago, Joker_007 said:

Nope! not in my circle .. we never cared about this. 

In India it became like Race to become rich.. I asked most of Indian friends ..what makes them to think they won this Race or at what point they are going to end this , most of them do not have answer to this. there is no end to this until you develop positive side of thinking and stop lowering your self esteem. 

Again, Indian upbringing is all about esteemed education, good earning, adding assets and securing kids future and repeat for next generation. This same mentality of Indians didnt change and will not even when they migrated abroad. 

In talking we can say all this, but in reality knowingly /Unknowingly  you always will be part and parcel of this race

 

[Tryad]

6 minutes ago, praying said:

You guys ** each other aa? Idedo chala tedagq undi uncle 

atleast we won't feel bad about losing touch with each other.

[Konebhar6]

1 hour ago, pavanjagan said:

I have a group of engineering friends who were very very close to me to an extent their families

visit us on many occasions more than our relatives. Sleep overs, dining was a common thing. But

my last visit to India gave me different experience. My friends are not discussing any fun stuff or

having relaxing chat most of the time I was with them they were trying boast about their achievements

and declare their properties. In a subtle way everyone was trying to show their superiority on others.

They no more have that innocent smile, big laugh for silly jokes, caring. In college days they would go to 

any extent to help each other but now they are trying avoid each other as much as possible. After our get together I came to know that they are not even meeting each other. We may be busy with our life but that 

doesn't we ignore friends and go in a rat race.

This is bound to happen with time. Everyone is busy with their life. City became so big that its a big hassel for people to come for a meet at a common place. Add traffic on top of that, kids who have grown up and may be sick or need to drop them to classes, etc. 

They may be sharing details about property to let everyone know they are doing good in life. May be proud of their achievements and want to share that with everyone. Kinda asking friends for validation. However, If you meet or talk to them regularly, these things wont come up. Group lo there are always 2-3 ppl like this. If someone brings up a topic like this in the group, ask them to take the bill  .. inta sampadinchav bill kattu kaka ani or ask them to throw a party later. or a simple fun statement like "Paisal tappitee em matladatleeduraa meeru ... baaga balisipoyinaaru". 

 

[Tryad]

Just now, ranku_mogudu said:

Again, Indian upbringing is all about esteemed education, good earning, adding assets and securing kids future and repeat for next generation. This same mentality of Indians didnt change and will not even when they migrated abroad. 

In talking we can say all this, but in reality knowingly /Unknowingly  you always will be part and parcel of this race

India also there are plenty of people who won't discuss their investments or properties at the drop of a hat.

but they have expensive hobbies like traveling (and never on a train) and move only around with people from their class. and seriously believing that roads should be further widened, and more flyovers built, and support their stupid team in IPL.

unfortunately its not that easy to escape this, unless you make a conscious effort.