Gender Jokes

[GUNTUR2US]

Gender jokes

[GUNTUR2US]

[color=#000000]A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't. A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change & she does. [/color]

[GUNTUR2US]

[color=#000000]A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument[/color]

[GUNTUR2US]

[color=#000000]To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot & love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot & not try to understand her at all. [/color]

[GUNTUR2US]

[color=#000000]Married men live longer than single men, but married men are a lot more willing to die. [/color]

[GUNTUR2US]

[color=#000000]A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't want. [/color]

[GUNTUR2US]

[b] Computers are female[/b]

[color=#000000]The top six reasons computers must be female: [/color]

[color=#000000]6. As soon as you have one, a better one is just around the corner. [/color]

[color=#000000]5. No one but the creator understands the internal logic. [/color]

[color=#000000]4. Even your smallest mistakes are immediately committed to memory for future reference. [/color]

[color=#000000]3. The native language used to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else. [/color]

[color=#000000]2. The message "Bad Command or File Name" is about as informative as [/color]

[color=#000000]"If you don't know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you". [/color]

[color=#000000]AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON COMPUTERS ARE FEMALE: [/color]

[color=#000000]As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half of your paycheck on accessories for it. [/color]

[GUNTUR2US]

[b] Be politically correct[/b]

[color=#000000]How to be politically correct with women[/color]

[color=#000000]She is not a BLEACHED BLONDE - She is PEROXIDE DEPENDENT. [/color]

[color=#000000]She is not a BAD COOK - She is MICROWAVE COMPATIBLE. [/color]

[color=#000000]She does not wear TOO MUCH JEWELRY - She is METALLICALLY OVERBURDENED. [/color]

[color=#000000]She is not CONCEITED - She is INTIMATELY AWARE OF HER BEST QUALITIES. [/color]

[color=#000000]She does not want to be MARRIED - She wants to lock you in DOMESTIC INCARCERATION. [/color]

[color=#000000]She does not GAIN WEIGHT - She is a METABOLIC UNDERACHIEVER. [/color]

[color=#000000]She does not TEASE or FLIRT - She engages in ARTIFICIAL STIMULATION. [/color]

[color=#000000]She is not DUMB - She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY. [/color]

[color=#000000]She is not TOO SKINNY - She is SKELETALLY PROMINENT. [/color]

[color=#000000]She does not HAVE A MUSTACHE - She is IN TOUCH WITH HER MASCULINE SIDE. [/color]

[color=#000000]She does not HATE TELEVISED SPORTS - She is ATHLETICALLY IGNORANT. [/color]

[color=#000000]She has not BEEN AROUND - She is a PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION. [/color]

[color=#000000]She does not WEAR TOO MUCH PERFUME - She commits FRAGRANCE ABUSE. [/color]

[color=#000000]She does not GO SHOPPING - She is MALL FLUENT. [/color]

[color=#000000]She is not an AIR HEAD - She is REALITY IMPAIRED. [/color]

[color=#000000]She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY - She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED. [/color]

[color=#000000]She does not get FAT or CHUBBY - She achieves MAXIMUM DENSITY. [/color]

[color=#000000]She is not COLD or FRIGID - She is THERMALLY INACCESSIBLE. [/color]

[color=#000000]She does not WEAR TOO MUCH MAKEUP - She has reached COSMETIC SATURATION. [/color]

[color=#000000]She does not NAG YOU - She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE [/color]

[riddle]