Random Jokes/one-Liners..

[summer27]

Ever since my girlfriend got pregnant, a lot has changed in my Life... Like my name, address, and mobile number...

[summer27]

Girl: Mera Kal Fast Tha. 2nd Girl: Lucky you, Mera Wala Toh Hamesha Hi Slow Rehta Hai...

[summer27]

If all MEN are the same, why do WOMEN take so long to choose one?

[summer27]

Columbus was 41 when he discovered America. I was 14 when I discovered Naughty America...

[summer27]

A man was lost on a island;1day he decided to build BOAT with wood;then a girl comes& the man uses wood for making BED. MORAL:A HOLE can change the GOAL

[summer27]

Wife- Aap bahot mote hogaye ho.
Santa- Tum bhi to kitni Moti hogayi ho!
Wife- Main to Maa bannewali hu.
Santa-Main bhi to Baap bannewala hu!

[summer27]

When is it that the skin meets skin, hair meets hair n balls disappear?? It's when u BLINK UR EYES

[Maximus]

[img]http://i54.tinypic.com/j9t65v.jpg[/img]

[summer27]

Wake up each morning and say to yourself "this day is mine" and then get screwed over by other people who've said the same.

[summer27]

SANTA: Yaar tu itna bada ho gaya hai aur tujhe abhi tak daadi mooch nai aayi? BANTA:Yaar me apni MAA pe gaya hu.

[summer27]

Kid: Officer, my dad is fighting! Officer: Which one is your dad?
Kid: That's what they're trying to figure out

[summer27]

Wife:Samne wale ghar me pati patni me kab se JHAGDA ho raha Hain,Aap ek bar jaiye na.
Husband:Mein 1-2 bar gaya tha, shayad usi ka natija hai.

[summer27]

85yr old man buys viagra&asks chemist:kiske sath loon?
Chemist -Chacha ganga jal ke sath le lo,pata nahi itni khushi bardasht kar paoge k nahi

[summer27]

Half of a woman's life goes in calculating how to repeat a dress without letting people know

[summer27]

Teacher: Agar koi moti ladki palat k waapis aye toh is sentence ko english me kya kahenge?
Santa: GOL MAAL RETURNS