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Posted

The traffic policeman stopped the car driver for crossing the traffic signal on a red.

'Didn't you see the red light?' Growled the policeman.

'Yes i did', replied the driver, 'But I didn't see you!'

Posted

Teacher: Raghu! You cannot sleep in my class!!

Raghu: I can, if you lower your voice a bit!

Posted

A man was standing in a field alone.He was doing nothing and was looking at nothing.

Soon a driver passed by,he got out of the car and went to the man in the field and asked him, 'What are you doing?'

The man in the field replied 'They say they give Nobel Prizes to people who are outstanding in their fields.'

Posted

Question: What did Sadam Hussain's son tell him during the war in Iraq.
Answer: BAGH-DAD!

Posted

Titanic is going to be drowned. Everybody in the ship is shouting, crying, running or praying to God, just then a passenger asked the captain of the ship.
Passenger: How far is land, from here?
Captain: Two miles...
Passenger: Only two miles, Then why are these fools making noise. I have got the experience of swimming even more.
Captsin: .....!@#$% ...??
Passenger: Just tell me which side, land is two miles from here ?
Captain: Downwards...

Posted

Q: Why did Santa take his pregnant wife Jeeto to Pizza Hut?
A: Because they advertised 'free delivery'

Posted

Osama consults a psychic about the date of his death.
Psychic: You will die on an American holiday.
Osama: Which one?
Psychic: Anyday you die shall be an American holiday

Posted

Man's greatest enemy is alcohol, but the Bible says, " Love thy enemy!"

Posted

My wife ran after the garbage truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?"
The driver said, "No, jump in!"

Posted

Santa to a girl: I want to marry you.
Girl: But, I am a year elder to you.
Santa: Then, I'll marry you next year

Posted

Q: Why does a witch ride on a broom?
A: Vacuum cleaners have to be plugged into the wall

Posted

Q: What is a vampires favorite mode of transportation?
A: A blood vessel

Posted

Q: What do you call someone who puts poison in a person's corn flakes?
A: A cereal killer..

Posted

Q: How do you stop a Pakistani tank?
A: Shoot the guys pushing it

Posted

From a passenger ship, everyone can see a bearded man on a small island who is shouting and desperately waving his hands.
"Who is it?" a passenger asks the captain.
"I've no idea. Every year when we pass, he goes nuts"

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