dealing

[pillirevanth]

On 10/24/2017 at 7:23 PM, raccha rambabu said:

Day in Day out.. aithaney untai.. U both have to come somewhere in the middle where you remind her and she picks it up from there.. something like that.

And showering love antava.. everyone has their own way of expressing their feeling.. cheppakapovacchu.. kanapadeyla undakapovacchu.... kaani artham ayyela mathram untundhi.( idi mathram personal experience bhayyoo).

Chill boss.. try to deal with her issues.. let her know that you are there to help her out. Doctor deggaraki velle antha pedda issues mee iddarivi kaadhu..

Chala mandhi ladies ki time management issues untai.. 8 ki bayataniki povali ante .. give her a 2 hr headsup instead of 1.. oorikine example chepthunna..

Focus more on the kid and not your deficiencies. I think that will bring you guys to a common path. Else things would go completely south. 

Take a chill pill man.. I know cheppatam easy kaani cheyyatam kastam.. but naku thelisindhi chepthunna.

 

32

racha statement bro.. touch chesav @Racha.Rambabu

[samaja_varagamana]

2 hours ago, tortoise said:

correct cheppav.... vala intiki painting aipogane pakkana vala intiki poyi kuda estharu 

Life anedi white wall lantidi torty sunnam eskuni nuvve paint eskovali ela cheppa

[tortoise]

1 hour ago, samaja_varagamana said:

Life anedi white wall lantidi torty sunnam eskuni nuvve paint eskovali ela cheppa

ok

[pillirevanth]

On 10/24/2017 at 11:20 PM, halwaraaj said:

most common scenario......5 yrs ayyindi antunnav.....godavalu avvadam start aina deggarnunchi ippati daka, neelo konni changes ochi untai, alage amelo, avento list cheyyi, self assess whether the changes are aggressive enough for the time period or really slow, same thing me wife ni thana point of view nunchi cheyamanu, kurchuni discuss cheyandi, these are very petty issues like small stones which would generally get crushed and eventually vanish when 2 gears are trying to fit and work together.

 

If one of you is seriously trying to overcome mistakes and not able to, then communicate with your partner and ask them to help....if they are not able to help and/or you are not able to overcome....then your partner will accept you as you are since you gave then the confidence that you tried everything you can(dont expect it right away....acceptance takes time)......

P. S : I am married for 4 years, since my 6th month after marriage till our 3rd anniversary we never had a single 15-day stretch without issues/arguments/quarrels some of them almost went till parting discussions.....but I always believed in one thing.....there is nothing more important for me in this world than keeping up and holding onto the relation, I hate to accept defeat in the game with life.....during this time my ego and this belief were colliding head on to win over each other......I held my breath and hung on and eventually, not a single quarrel in the last one year, I accept her as she currently is and she accepts me as I currently am. And now my belief is always level above my ego which made it possible. Game over!!

 

[pillirevanth]

 

[pillirevanth]

On 10/25/2017 at 10:57 AM, srdh21 said:

first learn the fact that change has to come first within yourselves.. that is how to control your emotions by shielding it from outside influences

second, stop expecting that others should go by your direction, this is the root of all evil and you can never have happy life with this approach

third,  if you want a planned life, have a short conversation first thing in morning about that days plan or objective, keep reminding her if you want to keep track of things

humans are unprogrammed robots, they have to listen to their brain first, any deviations that you see are not interpreted as wrong in her brain, the only way it to slowly train her with patience

as you both are working, its not easy for women to focus on work life and family life, you have to take the lead in directing  how things move on daily basis

what you are going through is just a chaos that can happen in every family due to both of you working, this does not qualify as a factor for depression, take a chill pill and relax daily by using some form of meditation

when ever you get angry, go out for a walk and breathe (breathe in through nose and breath out through mouth)

try the above for minimum 3-4 times, i am sure things will fall in line, the other advantage is she will also learn to reciprocate by seeing the change in you

[pillirevanth]

bro, appreciate for posting this thread.. Chala mandhi suffer ayye problem ae idi..nuvvu post chesav vallu cheyaledu anthe teda..
1 year back naadi kuda SAME TO SAME problem. Only difference is my wife won't work and my wife don't reply back when i scold her instead she do mouna vratham which is very dangorous than replying.
Think how much frustrated i was as my wife is being lazy, though she has lots of free time.

I realized my anger when my 3 year old daughter said to my wife as "Papa Lolli pedtadu, nenu papa tho aadukonu, neethone aadukunta"..
I feel ashamed myself for my anger and after being calm for several days i come up with one plan. Here is the plan.

When ever we both have free time(while my baby is sleeping) we discuss our ongoing flaws.
We list out each others flaws in seperate notepads and figure out the ways to resolve it. Once we find the solution we both stick to that pattern and follow. If we can't resolve an issue, then we think that its a boundary between us and should not bother/complain/get angry/upset on that. In the next discussion we review the previous issues noted, if it resolve then we move it to different notepad. As the list of items in "Issues Resolved" notepad increases you both confidence in your relationship. If over a period of time lets say 4-5 years if the items count in "Boundaries" is much GREATER than "issues resolved" then its high time to join in "Nityananda Swamy Aashramam"

People might think its an agile/scrum meetings or ISO standards what ever may be.. If it is solving your problems don't care any one.

Ex: 
Issues Pending with Husband
    1. Anger management - 6/21/2017
    2. Lavish Spending  - 8/10/2017 

Issues Pending with Wife
    1. Absent Minded - 2/1/2017
    2. Time management - 4/6/2017     

Issues Resolved with Husband
    1. Express Anger in Public 3/20/17 - 7/30/17

Issues Resolved with Wife
    1. Using the items before their expiration date 4/5/17 - 6/29/17     

Boundaries with Husband
    1. Partying with Friends during weekend.
    2. Gambling during alternate weekends.

Boundaries with Wife
    1. Shopping time (Leave her in the mall alone and let her do shopping as much time as she want)
    
    
 

[BostonBullodu]

4 minutes ago, pillirevanth said:

bro, appreciate for posting this thread.. Chala mandhi suffer ayye problem ae idi..nuvvu post chesav vallu cheyaledu anthe teda..
1 year back naadi kuda SAME TO SAME problem. Only difference is my wife won't work and my wife don't reply back when i scold her instead she do mouna vratham which is very dangorous than replying.
Think how much frustrated i was as my wife is being lazy, though she has lots of free time.

I realized my anger when my 3 year old daughter said to my wife as "Papa Lolli pedtadu, nenu papa tho aadukonu, neethone aadukunta"..
I feel ashamed myself for my anger and after being calm for several days i come up with one plan. Here is the plan.

When ever we both have free time(while my baby is sleeping) we discuss our ongoing flaws.
We list out each others flaws in seperate notepads and figure out the ways to resolve it. Once we find the solution we both stick to that pattern and follow. If we can't resolve an issue, then we think that its a boundary between us and should not bother/complain/get angry/upset on that. In the next discussion we review the previous issues noted, if it resolve then we move it to different notepad. As the list of items in "Issues Resolved" notepad increases you both confidence in your relationship. If over a period of time lets say 4-5 years if the items count in "Boundaries" is much GREATER than "issues resolved" then its high time to join in "Nityananda Swamy Aashramam"

People might think its an agile/scrum meetings or ISO standards what ever may be.. If it is solving your problems don't care any one.

Ex: 
Issues Pending with Husband
    1. Anger management - 6/21/2017
    2. Lavish Spending  - 8/10/2017 

Issues Pending with Wife
    1. Absent Minded - 2/1/2017
    2. Time management - 4/6/2017     

Issues Resolved with Husband
    1. Express Anger in Public 3/20/17 - 7/30/17

Issues Resolved with Wife
    1. Using the items before their expiration date 4/5/17 - 6/29/17     

Boundaries with Husband
    1. Partying with Friends during weekend.
    2. Gambling during alternate weekends.

Boundaries with Wife
    1. Shopping time (Leave her in the mall alone and let her do shopping as much time as she want)
    
    
 

leni poni ideas istunnavu kada baaa.. 

[Kona]

On 10/24/2017 at 6:07 PM, liteteesko said:

xyz

Ltt

[KasakRaja]

On 10/24/2017 at 9:40 PM, Bapineedu said:

DB people very good responses icharu,as usual ga topic ni comedy cheyyakunda,  Appreciate it. 

Cheers bro 

[rapchik]

[rapchik]

On 10/25/2017 at 9:05 AM, littlestar said:

You are Lucky. Ninnu Bharisthunnanduku.

come aside ..lets talk man 

[rapchik]

On 10/24/2017 at 11:22 PM, Kumaravarma said:

Neenu emi decide chesanu ante. Women vinnakapothe divorce and marry other girl . No compromise jai Pawan Kalyan 

next woman kuda alane vasthe..everyone cant be pawan kalyan....basic ga women is like that.. so chill pill