Desire to return to India - faux nostalgia? An analogy.

[nosugarplease]

11 hours ago, JAMBALHOT_RAJA said:

Parents fault kuda undi, vallu veellu America potunaru ani pillalni elagaina America pampistaru, old age vachaka pillalu daggara unte baguntadi ani feel avutaru but ee gap lo valla pillalaki own family form ayuntadi America lo and they are locked here

i think it changed now.. not all parents are  as desperate as they used to be  to send kids off 

[nosugarplease]

5 minutes ago, andhra_jp said:

I am very happy for returning to india after staying in UK for 12yrs..

It all depends on mindset about what exactly you want in life..

For some india is best and others US might be home away home...

I rejected onsite opportunities after returning to india as unless compelled for any family reasons i dont want to leave India till my death.

yes clarity vundali.. i know a cousin who left america  after just 3 years stay and another one in Aus left after education.

one is managerial IT, other somewhat struggling but both happy.
they were clear about what they wanted...interestingly they were both into villages/farming..

[Telugodura456]

42 minutes ago, andhra_jp said:

I am very happy for returning to india after staying in UK for 12yrs..

It all depends on mindset about what exactly you want in life..

For some india is best and others US might be home away home...

I rejected onsite opportunities after returning to india as unless compelled for any family reasons i dont want to leave India till my death.

As someone who stayed both in uk and us ...i say its far difficult to leave us than uk.

Far more telugu diaspora in us, racism is lesser, earning is more and in general more comfortable.

[krishnaaa]

53 minutes ago, nosugarplease said:

i know i am having irrational worry about future misery.
ee feelings vachinappudu..konchem gaali ki poi, nalguru appthulatho  matladithe mood set avthundhi ..

yes balance -  atu parents , itu mana life and mana kids future
and always keep busy I guess..to avoid these worries.

Make double or triple sure  to spend time for yourself that uplifts your mood.

Like going to Gym or out for a jog whichever you prefer.....sleeping and waking up on time etc

This is a must for people who are away from home.

Don't forget.....everything is in your hand.

[telugu_fan]

19 hours ago, Tyrannosauraus_Rex said:

When I was young - for every summer vacation we used to go to Rajahmundry, Kakinada and other small villages and towns in Andhra Pradesh. Although I am from Hyderabad - most of my relatives were/are from Andhra.

One of the relatives I loved really loved - was my Mavayya - my mother's younger brother. 

My affection for my uncle was so strong that I used to dream about the vacation almost a month in advance. He was a strongly built man, kind, showered immense love on our family and essentially I looked up to him.

It was one of those summer vacations when I was in Rajahmundry -and one evening my uncle and I went to a vegetable market. It rained pretty heavily earlier and we stepped out once the rains relented.

Ala nadusthu nenu  -  "Mavayya, varsham padinappudu Rajahmundry inka entha andamga undo kada" - 

To this my uncle's response was brutally sarcastic and I still remember it to this day.

He said "Orai, neeku naa meeda unna abhimaanamtho -naaku relatedga unna anni vishayaalu neeku andamga anipisthunnayi. 

"Neekemo varshamlo Rajahmundry andamga kanipisthundi - kaani naakemo road meda burada, domalu, open drainage meeda pandulu, nuvvu vesukunna hawai chappals valla nuvvu nadusthunnapudu aa chappals lonchi burada ni venkala shirt meeda padadam, nee aa burada shirt ni uthakaleka attayya padey kastaalu,  kaaseptalo current pothey vacchey ikkatlu - ivvani kanipisthunnai.

"Nuvveymo current pothey ee kovvathula veluthurulo mee illu entha bavundi mavayya antaavu - nenemo nee gurinchi mosquito net ready chesthuntey".

"Crux of the matter enti antey - neeku ivvani andamga, teeyaga anipisthayi endukantey - subconsciously you know in the heart of your hearts that you are only going to stay here for a week or two- you are actually not going to experience or live here in Rajahmundry on a permanent basis. So, intha short stay lo nee emotions anni baaga condense ayipoyi anni adbhuthamga, anni andamga anipisthayi. Adey nuvvu Hyderabad vadilesi puurthi ga Rajahmundry shift aithey nee paata verey laaga untundi.  Aina neeku ivvani ippudu artham kaavu - you will remember this conversation in the future.

 

My uncle died a few years later after that conversation and I was devastated. Kaani naaku chaala years taruvatha artham ayyindi what he actually meant ani.

 

Kontha mandi friends -  India vellinappudu for a few weeks - prathidi chaala nostalgic ga, andamga anipisthundi but maybe because they know they are not actually going to stay there permanently. They are secure in the knowledge that they will back in the US after a few weeks/months.

Asalu nijam ga antha India antey istam untey - asalu India vadilivelley vaallamey kadu kada. I still remember my Dad's tears at the airport when I first left India.

I am not saying that the nostalgic feeling we get is not genuine but I am convinced that some people get that strong feeling because they know they are actually not going to stay in India. I mean imagine- for example -  their true feelings while they are lamenting/longing about India - they got news that they got deported or their GC got canceled. Appudu nostalgia antha pooyi, India lo undey corruption, police brutality, politics, relatives tho lolli - ivvani gurthu vasthayi - if you were to stay back in India permanently.

So all those people who are in the US - count your lucky stars - you are in a much better country than India. And the fact that you chose to leave India is evidence of it.

Either way it was my uncle's death anniversary recently and I remembered that conversation in Rajahmundry all those years ago - just wanted to share it with you guys.

 

 

 

Good post bro, brought back some memories of summer vacation for me as well.

but as my friend working in UK said "grass is always green on the other side ani". he doesn't feel anything special in the UK, ok life ani annadu, but earning money is the key driver for most of the people to move abroad.

[Tyrannosauraus_Rex]

Thanks a lot for your comments guys. 

I did forget to mention something in my original post. The only thing that I miss in India is really my parents, my younger brother and his kids.  The rest of it all I do not particularly long for or crave for. 

Maybe because my parents are growing older - the feeling of guilt/pain is only growing stronger. The only consolation I have is that my younger brother is in India and he is at least readily available to attend to their needs.

Next week I am going to India and have decided to spend every single day of the 3 weeks with my parents. If any of my friends want to meet me - I'll have to tell them to come to me. I am not going anywhere leaving my parents during my stay in India this time.

 

[Tyrannosauraus_Rex]

19 hours ago, AnotherTeluguBidda said:

bro ....rajahmundry nijangane varsham lo chala bauntundi.  Memu kooda ilaage vellevallam hyd nundi rjy... return vasthu echevadini. I know people who settled in rjy after retirement. Its all perception....

I agree with you. I absolutely love Rajahmundry. Kaani akkada undeyvallaki maybe different ga anipisthundemo. Because my uncle did not like rain in Rajahmundry because he used to complain about messy roads with sludge, mosquitoes etc., 

[BommaliNinnodhala]

On 10/12/2022 at 6:14 PM, Tyrannosauraus_Rex said:

When I was young - for every summer vacation we used to go to Rajahmundry, Kakinada and other small villages and towns in Andhra Pradesh. Although I am from Hyderabad - most of my relatives were/are from Andhra.

One of the relatives I loved really loved - was my Mavayya - my mother's younger brother. 

My affection for my uncle was so strong that I used to dream about the vacation almost a month in advance. He was a strongly built man, kind, showered immense love on our family and essentially I looked up to him.

It was one of those summer vacations when I was in Rajahmundry -and one evening my uncle and I went to a vegetable market. It rained pretty heavily earlier and we stepped out once the rains relented.

Ala nadusthu nenu  -  "Mavayya, varsham padinappudu Rajahmundry inka entha andamga undo kada" - 

To this my uncle's response was brutally sarcastic and I still remember it to this day.

He said "Orai, neeku naa meeda unna abhimaanamtho -naaku relatedga unna anni vishayaalu neeku andamga anipisthunnayi. 

"Neekemo varshamlo Rajahmundry andamga kanipisthundi - kaani naakemo road meda burada, domalu, open drainage meeda pandulu, nuvvu vesukunna hawai chappals valla nuvvu nadusthunnapudu aa chappals lonchi burada ni venkala shirt meeda padadam, nee aa burada shirt ni uthakaleka attayya padey kastaalu,  kaaseptalo current pothey vacchey ikkatlu - ivvani kanipisthunnai.

"Nuvveymo current pothey ee kovvathula veluthurulo mee illu entha bavundi mavayya antaavu - nenemo nee gurinchi mosquito net ready chesthuntey".

"Crux of the matter enti antey - neeku ivvani andamga, teeyaga anipisthayi endukantey - subconsciously you know in the heart of your hearts that you are only going to stay here for a week or two- you are actually not going to experience or live here in Rajahmundry on a permanent basis. So, intha short stay lo nee emotions anni baaga condense ayipoyi anni adbhuthamga, anni andamga anipisthayi. Adey nuvvu Hyderabad vadilesi puurthi ga Rajahmundry shift aithey nee paata verey laaga untundi.  Aina neeku ivvani ippudu artham kaavu - you will remember this conversation in the future.

 

My uncle died a few years later after that conversation and I was devastated. Kaani naaku chaala years taruvatha artham ayyindi what he actually meant ani.

 

Kontha mandi friends -  India vellinappudu for a few weeks - prathidi chaala nostalgic ga, andamga anipisthundi but maybe because they know they are not actually going to stay there permanently. They are secure in the knowledge that they will back in the US after a few weeks/months.

Asalu nijam ga antha India antey istam untey - asalu India vadilivelley vaallamey kadu kada. I still remember my Dad's tears at the airport when I first left India.

I am not saying that the nostalgic feeling we get is not genuine but I am convinced that some people get that strong feeling because they know they are actually not going to stay in India. I mean imagine- for example -  their true feelings while they are lamenting/longing about India - they got news that they got deported or their GC got canceled. Appudu nostalgia antha pooyi, India lo undey corruption, police brutality, politics, relatives tho lolli - ivvani gurthu vasthayi - if you were to stay back in India permanently.

So all those people who are in the US - count your lucky stars - you are in a much better country than India. And the fact that you chose to leave India is evidence of it.

Either way it was my uncle's death anniversary recently and I remembered that conversation in Rajahmundry all those years ago - just wanted to share it with you guys.

 

 

 

Everyone experience is different man — some has positives — some negatives — most of them neutral — 

[BommaliNinnodhala]

13 minutes ago, Tyrannosauraus_Rex said:

Thanks a lot for your comments guys. 

I did forget to mention something in my original post. The only thing that I miss in India is really my parents, my younger brother and his kids.  The rest of it all I do not particularly long for or crave for. 

Maybe because my parents are growing older - the feeling of guilt/pain is only growing stronger. The only consolation I have is that my younger brother is in India and he is at least readily available to attend to their needs.

Next week I am going to India and have decided to spend every single day of the 3 weeks with my parents. If any of my friends want to meet me - I'll have to tell them to come to me. I am not going anywhere leaving my parents during my stay in India this time.

 

Brother unnaka yem tension man — chill — i understand the situation about parents  — 

[Tyrannosauraus_Rex]

2 hours ago, BommaliNinnodhala said:

Everyone experience is different man — some has positives — some negatives — most of them neutral — 

I fully agree with you. It is true that everyone has their own unique experience and perspective. I was just sharing mine.

[nagchiru]

ya, my experience is different as well. I have mostly come across selfish and judgmental people in India. That's the thing I worry about the most. Unfortunately, I had the same experience with my parents as well as close relatives. It doesn't mean that I don't love them, however I am always cautious before acting emotionally. 

[nagchiru]

10 hours ago, telugu_fan said:

Good post bro, brought back some memories of summer vacation for me as well.

but as my friend working in UK said "grass is always green on the other side ani". he doesn't feel anything special in the UK, ok life ani annadu, but earning money is the key driver for most of the people to move abroad.

I don't think for most of the people earning money id the key driver, maybe for some initially but my experience is that people stay back in foreign countries for several other factors. 

[nagchiru]

You have great writing skills, keep working on it bro.. you never know where it will take you!

[chingchang]

On 10/12/2022 at 6:14 PM, Tyrannosauraus_Rex said:

When I was young - for every summer vacation we used to go to Rajahmundry, Kakinada and other small villages and towns in Andhra Pradesh. Although I am from Hyderabad - most of my relatives were/are from Andhra.

One of the relatives I loved really loved - was my Mavayya - my mother's younger brother. 

My affection for my uncle was so strong that I used to dream about the vacation almost a month in advance. He was a strongly built man, kind, showered immense love on our family and essentially I looked up to him.

It was one of those summer vacations when I was in Rajahmundry -and one evening my uncle and I went to a vegetable market. It rained pretty heavily earlier and we stepped out once the rains relented.

Ala nadusthu nenu  -  "Mavayya, varsham padinappudu Rajahmundry inka entha andamga undo kada" - 

To this my uncle's response was brutally sarcastic and I still remember it to this day.

He said "Orai, neeku naa meeda unna abhimaanamtho -naaku relatedga unna anni vishayaalu neeku andamga anipisthunnayi. 

"Neekemo varshamlo Rajahmundry andamga kanipisthundi - kaani naakemo road meda burada, domalu, open drainage meeda pandulu, nuvvu vesukunna hawai chappals valla nuvvu nadusthunnapudu aa chappals lonchi burada ni venkala shirt meeda padadam, nee aa burada shirt ni uthakaleka attayya padey kastaalu,  kaaseptalo current pothey vacchey ikkatlu - ivvani kanipisthunnai.

"Nuvveymo current pothey ee kovvathula veluthurulo mee illu entha bavundi mavayya antaavu - nenemo nee gurinchi mosquito net ready chesthuntey".

"Crux of the matter enti antey - neeku ivvani andamga, teeyaga anipisthayi endukantey - subconsciously you know in the heart of your hearts that you are only going to stay here for a week or two- you are actually not going to experience or live here in Rajahmundry on a permanent basis. So, intha short stay lo nee emotions anni baaga condense ayipoyi anni adbhuthamga, anni andamga anipisthayi. Adey nuvvu Hyderabad vadilesi puurthi ga Rajahmundry shift aithey nee paata verey laaga untundi.  Aina neeku ivvani ippudu artham kaavu - you will remember this conversation in the future.

 

My uncle died a few years later after that conversation and I was devastated. Kaani naaku chaala years taruvatha artham ayyindi what he actually meant ani.

 

Kontha mandi friends -  India vellinappudu for a few weeks - prathidi chaala nostalgic ga, andamga anipisthundi but maybe because they know they are not actually going to stay there permanently. They are secure in the knowledge that they will back in the US after a few weeks/months.

Asalu nijam ga antha India antey istam untey - asalu India vadilivelley vaallamey kadu kada. I still remember my Dad's tears at the airport when I first left India.

I am not saying that the nostalgic feeling we get is not genuine but I am convinced that some people get that strong feeling because they know they are actually not going to stay in India. I mean imagine- for example -  their true feelings while they are lamenting/longing about India - they got news that they got deported or their GC got canceled. Appudu nostalgia antha pooyi, India lo undey corruption, police brutality, politics, relatives tho lolli - ivvani gurthu vasthayi - if you were to stay back in India permanently.

So all those people who are in the US - count your lucky stars - you are in a much better country than India. And the fact that you chose to leave India is evidence of it.

Either way it was my uncle's death anniversary recently and I remembered that conversation in Rajahmundry all those years ago - just wanted to share it with you guys.

 

 

 

You Mama was 100 % right man .. But RJY has magic for sure .. I was born and brought up very near to RJY. Your post brought back lo ofmy childhood memories. I still love that place 

[Sarvapindy]

1 hour ago, nagchiru said:

You have great writing skills, keep working on it bro.. you never know where it will take you!

it will take all the way to US..from there to sc..uncle already reached