Feeling sad and guilty about my ex - My mistakes and lessons to learn

[rkiran1988]

Indaaka group lo oka ex gurinchi post chusi naaku naa ex and naa mistakes valla padaina thana jeevitham gurtochindhi. Tana story & situation telisaka past few months nunchi feeling very sad and guilty for my mistakes/choices which have screwed up multiple lives.

Maa love story college nunchi start ayyindhi. College ayyaka we got job in a city different from our hometown. total ga, we were together for 7 years. My first & BIGGEST mistake - getting physically close to each other. Vere city lo undadam valla freedom vachi physical ga close ayyam. Pelli time vache sariki iddari intlo full opposition as we are from different caste. Maa intlo last ki OK annaru but chelli marriage ayyake maa marriage annaru but naaku na sister ki age gap ekkuva and my ex & I would have been at least 30 by the time my sister would get married. Valla intlo vallu convince avvaledhu. Tanu vachestha, manam pelli cheuskundam anindhi but naaku dhairyam chaala ledhu. This was my another MISTAKE.

Whatever, tana marriage fix ayyindhi. I was completely broken and took couple of months to recover. Tana pelli fix ayyaka and marrige ayina first few months varaku contact lo unnam. Initial ga calls lo and later in message/email etc. This is another MISTAKE. we used the same email accounts from our past to chat. Pelli ayyaka regular chats chesam but memu relationship lo unappudu sexting etc untayi aa accounts lo. Same accounts lo maa intimate pics  etc untayi. Daani password iddariki telusu. We should have deleted all those messages, pics or those accounts. Another big MISTAKE. Then, one day she messaged me saying her husband found out about our past and she cannot keep in touch with me anymore. I tried to message, call her and her friends but emi vinaledhu. Later, I found out she changed her phone number, deleted all her Social Network accounts and was not in touch with any of her school or college friends. Ala few months gadichindhi and finally, naa focus antha carrer meedha petti manchiga grow ayya. Now, in a envious position among my peers. Fell in love again and this time married my GF.  Naaku success vachaka and naa life happy ga set ayyaka, I developed bitter/revenge kind of thoughts on my ex and wanted to show how successful & happy I was after we broke up.

But, then I met one of her friends and learnt the full story. Naa ex marriage ayyaka first few months vallu happy ga unde. She and her husband used to hang out with her gal friends/their husbands and he seemed like a decent guy. Then, athaniki maa past gurinchi antha telisindhi. Maa paatha private sexting chats,emails, paatha intimate photos, pelli ayyaka messages anni dorikayi from her/our email account. Full godava ayyindhi. Valla families involve ayyaru and naa ex parents and her uncles/aunts families mundhu motham proof tho saha bayata pettesaadu. Next, you can imagine how the situation would have been. Naa ex ni valla in-laws, parents, family antha tittukunnaru. But somehow, it did not end in divorce. But, she cut-off contacts with all her friends even ammayilatho. Even cousins etc tho kuuda no contact. Infact, she rarely visits her home anta. They are still having problems. Not sure if they are leading a married life or not. Marriage ayyi 10 years avutundhi but still no kids anta. Idantha telisaka I somehow found her address and saw her and her husband from far. Kallalo neelu vachayi bhayya. Manishi baaga padayyindhi. Aame husband ni engagment lo dooram nunchi chusi inferior feel ayya. Even he looks really bad now. Unhappy, depressed unte janalu inthala padavuatara anipinchindhi. Nneu naa youth lo chesina mistakes, choices valla ila lives affect avutayi ani anukoledhu. 

I somehow in some way feel responsible for spoiling her life and causing grief to so many people. Paina chuste, there were multiple stages where I made mistake. Okka daggara correct choice or decision teesukunna, situation would have been different.

Relationships lo unna vallaki suggestions bhayya: Try to convince parents and get married to your lovers. Try to avoid getting physical before marriage. If you end up not getting married, cut all ties or at least delete all intimate emails, messages, pics so that all will have a clean slate or appearance of a clean slate.