ManOnFire Posted July 23, 2012 Author Report Posted July 23, 2012 5. At a family get-together: When some distant aunt meets you after years... Stupid Question:-Munna, Chickoo, you've become so big. Answer:-Well you haven't particularly shrunk yourself.
ManOnFire Posted July 23, 2012 Author Report Posted July 23, 2012 6. When a friend announces her wedding, and you ask... Stupid QuestionL-Is the guy you're marrying good? Answer:- No,he's a miserable wife-beating , insensitive lout...it's just the money.
ManOnFire Posted July 23, 2012 Author Report Posted July 23, 2012 . When you get woken up at midnight by a phone call... Stupid Question:-. were you sleeping? Answer:-No. I was doing research on whether the Zulu tribes in Africa marry or not. You thought I was sleeping....you dumb witted moron.
ManOnFire Posted July 23, 2012 Author Report Posted July 23, 2012 8. When you see a friend/colleague with evidently shorter hair... Stupid Question:-Hey have you had a haircut? Answer:-No, its autumn and I'm shedding......
ManOnFire Posted July 23, 2012 Author Report Posted July 23, 2012 9. At the dentist when he's sticking pointed objects in your mouth... Stupid Question:Tell me if it hurts? Answer:-No it wont. It will just bleed.
ManOnFire Posted July 23, 2012 Author Report Posted July 23, 2012 10. At a restaurant: When you ask the waiter Stupid Question:-Is ! the "Butter Paneer Masala" dish good?? Answer:-No, its terrible and made of adulterated cement.We occassionaly also spit in it.
ManOnFire Posted July 23, 2012 Author Report Posted July 23, 2012 [color="Red"][size="5"]Two fraternity brothers...[/size][/color] [color="Blue"][size="4"]Two fraternity brothers decide to go sailing one afternoon and become lost. After twenty hours with nothing to eat or drink, one of them spots a lamp floating by. He picks it up and a genie pops out. The genie notices the poor condition of the brothers and grants them one wish between the two of them. After a lot of arguing over who gets the wish, one of them blurts out, "I wish the ocean was made of beer." Magically, the ocean turns to beer. Infuriated, the other guy yells, "You idiot! Now we have to piss in the boat!"[/size][/color]
ManOnFire Posted July 23, 2012 Author Report Posted July 23, 2012 Smart Boss + Smart Employee = Profits Smart Boss + Dumb Employee = Production Dumb Boss + Smart Employee = Promotion Dumb Boss + Dumb Employee = Overtime
ManOnFire Posted July 23, 2012 Author Report Posted July 23, 2012 1 million attended for Chiru's meeting.... Half of those attendees don't have vote, 100k each from Tamilnadu and Karnataka states those are not eligible to vote, Out of remaining 300k, Cops 50k and Volunteers 50k. 100k came to meeting instead of going movie to save movie money. 25k attended because of free transportation. 74,990 came to visit LV Rao (Lord Venkateswara Rao) and Remaning are Stage Decorator, Mike provider, Chiru, Nagababu, Pawan, Aravind, Chiru's wife, RamCharan... these are today's headlines....
ManOnFire Posted July 23, 2012 Author Report Posted July 23, 2012 [img]http://images.wikia.com/uncyclopedia/images/4/41/Bush_connecticut_welcome.jpg[/img]
ManOnFire Posted July 23, 2012 Author Report Posted July 23, 2012 [b][color="Red"]Just A Juggalo[/color][/b] [color="Blue"]A man is driving home, when is pulled over by a patrolman for a broken blinker. The cop looks into the guys' car and sees a collection of knives in the backseat. "Sir," the cop says. "Why do you have all those knives?" "They're for my juggling act," the man says. "I don't believe you," says the cop. "Prove it." So the man gets out of his car and begins juggling the knives. At the same time, a car with two guys in it drives by. "Man," says the first guy. "I'm glad I quit drinking. These new sobriety tests are hard."[/color]
ManOnFire Posted July 23, 2012 Author Report Posted July 23, 2012 A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit her ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, "If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes."
ManOnFire Posted July 23, 2012 Author Report Posted July 23, 2012 The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, "Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes. Whatever you wish for, your husband will get times ten." The woman said, "That's okay." and for her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, "You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis whom women will flock to. " The woman replied, "That's okay, because I will be the most beautiful woman and he will have eyes only for me." So, KAZAM! she's the most beautiful woman in the world. For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. The frog said, "That will make your husband the richest man in the world and he will be ten times richer than you ". The woman said, "That's okay, because what's mine is his and & what's his is mine." So, KAZAM! she's the richest woman in the world. The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, "I'd like a mild heart attack." Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't mess with them. Attention female readers: This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good. Attention Male readers ONLY : Please scroll down. The man had a heart attack ten times milder than his wife. Moral of the story: Women are really dumb but think they're really smart. Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this, it only goes to show that you women never listen!
ManOnFire Posted July 23, 2012 Author Report Posted July 23, 2012 Two little boys, ages 8 and 10, are extremely mischievous. They are always getting into trouble and their parents know all about it. If any mischief occurs in their town, the two boys are probably involved. The boys' mother heard that a preacher in town had been successful in disciplining children, so she asked if he would speak with her boys. The preacher agreed, but he asked to see them individually. So the mother sent the 8 year old first, in the morning, with the older boy to see the preacher in the afternoon. The preacher, a huge man with a booming voice, sat the younger boy down and asked him sternly, "Do you know where God is, son?" The boy's mouth dropped open, but he made no response, sitting there wide-eyed with his mouth hanging open. So the preacher repeated the question in an even sterner tone, "Where is God?!" Again, the boy made no attempt to answer. The preacher raised his voice even more and shook his finger in the boy's face and bellowed, "Where is God?!" The boy screamed and bolted from the room, ran directly home and dove into his closet, slamming the door behind him. When his older brother found him in the closet, he asked, "what happened?" The younger brother, gasping for breath, replied, "We are in BIG trouble this time. .......... ..... ........... ...... ......... ........... .................. ............................. ........... GOD is missing, and they think we did it!!!!!!!!!!
ManOnFire Posted July 23, 2012 Author Report Posted July 23, 2012 [b][i]Sardar's theory : Moon is more impt than Sun, coz it gives light at night when light is needed & Sun gives light during the day when light is not needed!!! [/i][/b]
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