ManOnFire Posted July 21, 2012 Author Report Posted July 21, 2012 U can bcome an engineer if u study in engineering college. U cannot bcom a president if u studies in Presidency College
ManOnFire Posted July 21, 2012 Author Report Posted July 21, 2012 U can expect a BUS from a BUS stop ... u cannot expect a FULL from FULL stop
ManOnFire Posted July 21, 2012 Author Report Posted July 21, 2012 A mechanical engineer can become a mechanic but a software engineer cannot become a soft
ManOnFire Posted July 21, 2012 Author Report Posted July 21, 2012 U can find tea in teacup. But cannot find world in world cup
ManOnFire Posted July 21, 2012 Author Report Posted July 21, 2012 U can find keys in Keyboard but u cannot find mother in motherboard.
ManOnFire Posted July 21, 2012 Author Report Posted July 21, 2012 [b]Good: Your hubby and you agree, no more kids. Bad: You can't find your birth control pills. UGLY: Your daughter has them.[/b]
ManOnFire Posted July 21, 2012 Author Report Posted July 21, 2012 Good: Your son studies a lot in his room. Bad: You find several p o r n movies hidden there. UGLY: You're in them.
ManOnFire Posted July 21, 2012 Author Report Posted July 21, 2012 Good: Your husband understands fashion. Bad: He's a crosMasteroesser. UGLY: He looks better than you.
ManOnFire Posted July 21, 2012 Author Report Posted July 21, 2012 [b]Good: Your son's finally maturing. Bad: He's involved with the woman next door. UGLY: So are you.[/b]
ManOnFire Posted July 21, 2012 Author Report Posted July 21, 2012 Good: You give the birds and bees speech to your daughter. Bad: She keeps interrupting. UGLY: With corrections.
ManOnFire Posted July 21, 2012 Author Report Posted July 21, 2012 Good: Your wife's not talking to you. Bad: She wants a divorce. UGLY: She's a lawyer.
ManOnFire Posted July 21, 2012 Author Report Posted July 21, 2012 Good: You came home for a quickie. Bad: The postman had the same idea. UGLY: You have to wait.
ManOnFire Posted July 21, 2012 Author Report Posted July 21, 2012 The schoolteacher was taking his first golfing lesson. "Is the word spelt p-u-t or p-u-t-t?'' he asked the instructor. "P-u-t-t is correct,'' he replied. "Put means to place a thing where you want it. [b]Putt means merely a vain attempt to do the same thing.[/b]"
ManOnFire Posted July 21, 2012 Author Report Posted July 21, 2012 At a doctors surgery one morning a patient arrives complaining of Serious backache. The doctor examines him and asks him"What the hell did you do to your back?" The patient replies "You know that I work for a local night club? Today morning I got home to my apartment early and heard a noise in my bedroom. On entering I knew someone had been sleeping with my wife and the balcony door was open. I rushed out the balcony door and did not find anyone. As looked down from the balcony I saw a man running out and he was dressing himself. I grabbed the fridge and threw it at him. That's how I strained my back" The 2nd patient arrives looking as if he has been in a car wreck. The doctor says "My previous looked bad, but you look terrible.What the hell happened to you?" He replies, "You know I have been unemployed for a while now .Today was the first day at my new job. I forgot to set my alarm and was running late. I was running out of the building, getting dressed at the same time, and you won't believe it but I was hit by a fridge." The 3rd patient arrives; he looks even worse than the other two patients do.The doctor is shocked. Again asks, "What the hell happened to you?" "Well I was sitting in a fridge & someone threw it from the 3rd floor!"
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