Jokes

[ManOnFire]

> WHAT CAUSES ARTHRITIS?
A drunk man, who smelled like beer, sat down on a subway
next to a priest. The man's tie was stained ... his face was plastered with red lipstick ... and, a half-empty bottle of gin was sticking out of his torn coat pocket. He opened his newspaper, and began reading.

After a few minutes, the man turned to the priest, and asked, 'Say,
Father, what causes arthritis?'

The priest replies, 'My Son, it's caused by loose living -- being with cheap, wicked women ... too much alcohol ... contempt for your fellow man . sleeping around with prostitutes .. and, lack of a
bath.'

The drunk muttered, in response, 'Well, I'll be darned,' then returned to his paper.

The priest, thinking about what he had said, nudged the man, and
apologized. 'I'm very .. I didn't mean to come on so strong. How
long have you had arthritis?'

The drunk answered, 'I don't have it, Father. I was just reading here, that the Pope does.'

[ManOnFire]

1. Losing all your friends

Man comes home and finds his wife with his friend in bed.
He shoots his friend and kills him. Wife says 'If you behave like this, you will lose ALL your friends.'

[ManOnFire]

2. Brother wanted
A small boy wrote to Santa Claus,'send me a brother'....

Santa wrote back, 'SEND ME YOUR MOTHER'....

[ManOnFire]

3. Meaning of WIFE
Husband asks, 'Do you know the meaning of WIFE? It means 'Without Information Fighting Everytime'!'

Wife replies, 'No, it means 'With Idiot For Ever'!!!'

[ManOnFire]

5. Confident vs. confidential

A young boy asks his Dad, 'What is the difference between confident and confidential? ' Dad says, 'You are my son, I'm confident about that. Your friend over there, is also my son, that's confidential! '

[ManOnFire]

6. Anger management?
Husband: 'When I get mad at you, you never fight back. How do you control your anger?'

Wife: 'I clean the toilet.'
Husband: 'How does that help?'
Wife: 'I use your toothbrush .'

[ManOnFire]

LTT

[ManOnFire]

LTT

[ManOnFire]

"POOR BOYS!"

[ManOnFire]

But when a boy cries ---------- They say Come on man don't be A "Girl"

[ManOnFire]

If A Girl slaps a Boy ----------- Definitely the Boy would have "done something"

[ManOnFire]

If Boy Slaps a girl -------------- Rascal doesn't know how to "Respect Ladies"

[ManOnFire]

If a Girl is talking to Boys ----- She is "Very Friendly"

[ManOnFire]

If a Boy talks to a Girl ---------- He is "flirting"

[ManOnFire]

If a Girl meets with accident -------------------- Then its "mistake of others"